Tekkentrip
by jaganshing
Summary: Kazuya just graduated from College. He had a pen pal named Jun Kazama who's staying in Berlin for a couple of months. but he made a mistake.Kazuya had to go to Europe to fix this up.A lesson to learn when you have a pen pal.Chpter 11 up!
1. College at last

It was a fine day for Kazuya Mishima. He just graduated from college and ready to face the world of busy people by handling the Mishima Conglomerate with his brother Lee Chaolan,

"Finally!" Lee said as he bursts into excitement, Kazuya just shrugged and thinks about Heihachi, his father who's always surrounded by bodyguards wherever he goes

"_He's really afraid to die"_ Kazuya thought and started chuckling,

"what are you chuckling for? Is it my hair again!" Lee prompted.

"Yeah, they're starting to look like...Father's" Kazuya lied in a somehow irritating way for Lee.

"Why you no good…" Before Lee could finish the sentence with absolutely no good words in it,

A man named Paul Phoenix came up to them,

" Yo, Mishima, There you are, I'm not finished with you" Paul said looking at Kazuya then to Lee,

" Whoa man, what happened to your hair…It's white" Paul asked

"my hair is silver!" Lee said angrily, "I didn't notice, Hey, there are no such people with silver hair"

Paul said and started laughing,

Lee stood there annoyed, Out of the blue, a girl came by heading to Lee,

" Hey, Congratulations" the girl said.

" Thank you, honey" said Lee, He was about to kiss the girl but she moved away,

" I wanted to tell you something" she said,

"You know, you could always tell me everything" Lee said,

"About me dumping you" the girl said carelessly without wondering how Lee feels,

"Why?" Lee asked.

Kazuya and Paul started laughing hysterically at Lee.

Lee growled and looked at them

"It's not funny!" Lee said as he gave out a tongue,

"I got five reasons,

Number one, it's about those lame act,

Number two the tongue thing,

Number three the hair

Number four your brother looks hotter than you and

Number five I cant stand you cheating on me" the girl finally said,

Lee got surprised

"Hey, for your information I don't act lame, I act with originality, I use that tongue when I'm mad at Kazuya. My hair is silver, Kazuya is hotter than me? Why does it always have to be him! And I'M NOT CHEATING ON YOU!" Lee said then started gasping,

Kazuya and Paul stared at Lee straight faced,

"you talk to much, don't forget to breathe" Paul said.

"Okay, I'm lying, I'M cheating on you" The girl said with an evil look on her face,

"You monster…" Lee said almost crying.

"Oh and by the way, I only used you to buy me a car" said the girl as she walked away. Lee was so sad

"FIONA!" Lee called to her and started crying,

Heihachi went to them and hit him in the head

"I hate cry babies" Heihachi said, It came out that it was only a videotape, It started to rewind back where Lee gets hit in the head, It was rewind several times all over again.

"Could you give it a rest Yoshimitsu" Lee pleaded as Yoshimitsu started rewinding the tape again, Kazuya laughed teasingly

"So how's FIONA? By the way, did that head hurt?" Kazuya asked the irritated Lee,

"Stop it Kazuya!" Lee said

"Man, you look busted, there's a party out there at Marshall Law's. You can't just go there looking like that" Paul said making fun of Lee especially the hair,

"I TOLD YOU MY HAIR IS SILVER!" Lee shouted angrily. Yoshimitsu rewind the tape again,

"Get out Yoshi!" Lee said. Yoshimitsu walked out while teasing Lee

"Cry baby" Yoshimitsu said as he went out,

"Yeah right" Lee talked back,

"FIONA" Yoshimitsu called out again. Lee stood and started to cry

"what did I do to her! I gave her everything!" Lee said,

"Relax Lee, everyone knows I'm better than you" Kazuya said,

"No, NOBODY RELAXES! And I'm better than you!" Lee said,

"Whatever" Kazuya said while muttering the word "psycho gay" inside him.

"You Got Mail Mishima-sama" the computer called out, Kazuya went to the computer to read the mail.

"You're still writing to that Jun Kazama guy?" Paul asked,

"Yeah, I can't ignore this guy" Kazuya said as he typed a message,

'_I'm doing okay, thanks. Anyway, we just graduated from College' _Kazuya typed,

"You know, some people in the net can be crazy sometimes, In case you didn't know, One day, he'll ask you to arrange a meeting but all he want is to have sex with you and then he'll make an origami out of your genitals, So If I were you, I would tell Jun to stop writing" Lee said.

Kazuya looked at him expressionless,

"you mean someone made an origami out of your genitals?" Kazuya asked,

"No! My friend told me that when I was looking for someone to talk to" Lee said.

"Impossible, Jun is a nice guy, He'll never do such things" Kazuya said.

"Right…" Lee replied.

"Hey let's get going" Paul said as the three of them went on.

In Marshall's house, everyone was freakin' out, the others are drunk, some are talking, some are in the spa and some are just freaks looking for someone to be freaky with.

Lee was exploring around until he saw Anna wearing her usual red clothes, He quickly went to her and started flirting

"So, Do you come here often?" Lee started.

Kazuya was exploring his vision around

"This party is nonsense" He said as he watched Marshall dancing,

"Was that a stance or a dance?" He thought, A minute later, Lee was thrown off beside Kazuya and Paul

"I guess that means a no" Lee said

"Go hump a post, Chaolan!" Anna yelled. Nina came along and started a catfight with Anna.

Anna and Nina started fighting in the corner,

"Hey, Anna, Nina how's it going" Paul said calling to them.

"Not too good, Anna here stole my perfume!" Nina said angrily,

"I did not!" Anna said. "They're the worst sisters ever" Paul said grinning

"So what are you planning this vacation?" Paul asked "A trip to Paris would be lovely" Anna said as Nina shrugged

"Cool!" Paul said

" Paris is a nice choice, I was planning to have a European babe for my own, It would make Fiona and the girls of our class look like walruses, And I, Will give that babe a romantic dinner by moonlight" Lee said full of confidence.

"Stuck on a boat with a weird, silver-haired man like you? You're starting to sound like a man" Paul said as he chuckled.

"I'm a man!" Lee yelled.

"Kind of man…a little man, Remember, you just got dumped" Kazuya added.

Lee ignored them and drank his beer.

"I bought a guidebook in case you need it" Lee said as he handed the guidebook to Anna and Nina.

"Out of nowhere, you suddenly showed us a guidebook" Kazuya said.

"Where's he hiding it?" Paul wondered.

"The Arc de Triumph? Sounds good" Anna said as she turned the pages of the guidebook. A guy wearing a black shirt went up the stage,

"Attention ya'll, I'm dedicating this song to someone special, Fiona" The guy said as Fiona went up the stage to join him,

"Fiona?" wondered the surprised Lee. As the song goes:

"**_Chaolan doesn't know that Fiona and me do it in my van every Sunday, she tells him she's in church but she doesn't go still she's on her knees and Chaolan Doesn't know, Chaolan doesn't know, So don't tell Chaolan, Chaolan doesn't know"_**

Lee was rally provoked and started to get very drunk.

"Hey! Hey! Hey! You people! I need a woman! You hear me? I just got dumped!" Lee yelled.

"COME ON! Let's leave him!" Kazuya said as he started to walk away

"I wouldn't do that if I were you" Paul said pointing to Lee.

"Did you know that my brother Kazuya has been…" before Lee could finish his sentence, he was hit in the head by a very mad Kazuya.

"I think we should drag this FREAK home!" Kazuya said as he and Paul dragged Lee out of the party.

Kazuya and Paul have to carry him home which gave them a hard time.

"I'll see you guys tomorrow" Paul said leaving, "Okay" Kazuya said as he closed the door,

"You Got Mail Mishima-sama" the computer indicated another mail.

"Oh, It's only Jun" Kazuya said as he opened his message that says

"_Hey, I'm glad you're doing fine Kazuya, I always pray you will. Congratulations anyway, I really do wish I was there in your graduation. You know, I'm just wondering, We've been talking for the whole 5 months and still we haven't got a chance to see each other, Maybe we could arrange a meeting or something, I really want to know you better in personal, what do you say?"_

"What the #&$! Lee was right, this guy wants to have sex with me" Kazuya said irritated, Kazuya typed:

"_Listen Jun, I don't want to arrange any meetings, you perverted fag! And keep your hands off my genitals since you might turn it into an origami without me knowing. You're sick and corrupted! I never should've talked to you and if I did saw you, I'm going to kick your sorry ass. Go find some other guys to #&# with, Goodbye" _

"That took care of everything" Kazuya said as he went to bed.

Morning came and Kazuya felt his head ache a bit,

"Next time Lee gets drunk, I'll leave him" He said as he laughed evilly.

"And I'm not attending that party again" he added. He turned on the television to see what's up in the news, A cop named Lei Wulong was interviewed by a reporter,

"It was a piece of cake" He said, Kazuya was surprised to see Lei

"That guy is freakin' familiar" He said and immediately opened his drawer to see the picture Jun sent him, Jun was not the guy but it's none other than Lei Wulong

"what the!" Kazuya felt like everything had been lost in front of him

"NO!" Kazuya yelled not realizing that everyone's still asleep.

In Jun's room, she's reading Kazuya's reply message,

"I don't believe you would tell things like that to your own friend, if you don't want me to write again then fine!" Jun said as she blocked her email and cried.

Back to the Mishima Mansion, Kazuya was on his knees in his room holding the picture, Lee entered with a teddy bear,

" Well somebody got up on the wrong side of the bed" teased Lee,

" Shut up, you thought I didn't see you coming with that sassy teddy bear in your hand, you drunk fag!" Kazuya said not looking at surprised Lee,

Lee threw the teddy bear right before Heihachi came in,

"Hey! Look before you throw!" Heihachi glared at laughing Lee,

"Kazuya, It's 7 in the morning! What are you yelling for?" Heihachi blurted. Kazuya looked at them with a very pissed off face.

Lee realized Kazuya's problem and was planning for revenge,

"Oh, Jun wants to arrange meetings with you?" Lee said in an irritating kind of way,

"I can't relate of whatever you two are talking about! I'm sleeping…..AGAIN!" Heihachi left without hearing Kazuya mumbled the words '_Sleep until you die'. _

Lee on the other hand had been laughing like a hyena

"Give it a rest, Lee!" Kazuya said angrily

" You faggots are always happy every time a guy loses someone he could have had" Kazuya said as he stood and checked his email,

"Darn, she blocked her email" Kazuya said, Lee stood there and remembered the way he looked through Kazuya, the day he's dumped by Fiona.

"_I win this time" _Lee thought but his thoughts got mixed up,

"SHE? Oh, I get it. There's nothing to be ashamed of. After all, you look masculine enough. They won't even notice you're gay" Lee mockingly said holding back his laughter as he heard Kazuya mumbling about a blocked email address.

"Well, If only I never believed your stupid story of faggot-perverted guys in the net I wouldn't have done this to Jun!" Kazuya said,

"I understand you dear brother, Sometimes you just need to open up your other side" Lee said teasingly,

"You're not getting my point, Jun's a girl!" Kazuya yelled at straight faced Lee.

Lee ignored his brother and opened his drawer

"Where are you hiding it?" Lee said out of nowhere

"What?" Kazuya asked confused,

"You know….the ones with the sexy chicks" Lee asked,

"Did you just go here to find that magazine? Are you planning something stupid? Good…it's in the drawer!" Kazuya said as he looked at the photo sadly, He didn't notice that Lee is behind him,

"Wow, Who's the hot chick in a white dress together with that freaky Lei Wulong? You know I could really use a woman right now" Lee said as he looked at the photo. Kazuya glared at him

"Just go look for your freakin' magazine!" Kazuya erupted.

"What did I do now?" Lee said in a girly voice in which Kazuya thinks.

"That woman IS Jun!" said the raged Kazuya,

"No kidding" Lee said in a satisfied tune of voice

"She's so hot… You know…I could…" before Lee could finish his sentence he was distracted by Kazuya's death glare

"Hey, chill out, It's not that you can't go where she is" Lee said that somehow gave Kazuya an idea,

"maybe you're right" Kazuya said in a grin,

"All I remember that she's staying in Berlin for 2 more months before she goes back to Japan. That's it, I'll go to Berlin" Kazuya said.

"You know, you could just wait for Jun to be back here in Japan rather than going in there" Lee said.

"Shut up Faggot!" Kazuya added. Paul suddenly entered the room

"Do I hear a trip to Europe here?" Paul asked,

"He's going to Berlin to see Jun Kazama" Lee said which made Paul surprised,

"You're meeting your guy friend? That's cool" Paul said,

"Paul, GIRL friend" said Lee indicating that Jun's a girl,

"What! No kidding" Paul said.

"See for your self" Lee said as he showed Paul the Photo.

"Man she's definitely the one worth chasing for. So when's the trip?" Paul asked,

"Today" Kazuya said as he grabbed his backpack and filled it with his stuff,

"Hey! We'll help you find Jun" Paul said,

"Me too, but, I'll look for European chicks as well" Lee added, Kazuya glared at them and went outside the room

"Just don't mess this day! Don't keep me waiting!" He said afterwards as Lee and Paul ran to pack their things.

As Kazuya was left alone he plotted something evil for his father

"Before anything else… father must worry…so in case we're lost…He'll look in every place just to find us… but what are the things that makes him worry? Oh…I know…." Kazuya said as he gave an evil grin,

He silently went to Heihachi's room. As he entered the room, He saw Heihachi hugging a pillow, his face comfortable, more like he's having sweet dreams.

"Gross, He really does think he's in a middle of a rut right now" Kazuya said as he sneaks beside Heihachi.

He opened Heihachi's closet and grabbed Heihachi's thong-thingy.

"_He-he, let's see how desperate you are to see your thong go bye-bye"_ Kazuya thought

Before he could leave, Heihachi sat in his bed and look sleepily at Kazuya

"Do you love me?" he asked out of nowhere asked.

"Uh…?" Before Kazuya could answer, Heihachi shrugged as he went back to sleep. Kazuya was startled, trying hard not to laugh.

"Weird" he added as he silently walked but before he could leave, he set Heihachi's alarm clock 5 hours late.

"_Now that's even better than taking revenge by killing him, but, I'm still going to kill him" _Kazuya thought with a grimace.

As he went outside, he saw Lee and Paul waiting for him

"Don't keep ME waiting huh?" Lee said remembering the words Kazuya blurted out a while ago.

"Come on!" He said as they went to the hangar, the three of them rushed to catch a flight to the Mishima Private plane but the pilot's ill so they decided to use an international airplane instead,

"Do you have a flight to Berlin?" Kazuya asked,

"No, but I could take you to London" the man said. "We'll take it" Lee said,

"London!" Kazuya asked,

"Calm down, you could commute to Berlin from there" Lee said.

"Fine, if we get lost in London, I'll have you dead!" Kazuya said as he, Paul and Lee went on.

As the plane took off, Kazuya stared outside with a frown. Lee is listening with his headset while Paul watched the kid with disgust as the kid started vomiting,

"Jun" Kazuya mumbled as he looked at the photo while caressing it, He was having a sad moment of his time until Lee started singing so loud that it distracted him

" I'M NOT A PERFECT PERSON, I'VE NEVER MEANT TO DO THOSE THINGS TO YOU, BUT I CONTINUED LEARNING" Lee sang in a somehow, out-of-tune voice that made Kazuya really irritated

"Come on! Sing with me" Lee said as he continued. Kazuya was so mad that he called a stewardess.

The stewardess walked to them with a smile

"Can I help you, sir" the stewardess said.

"Yeah, can you shut him up or does this plane have some place quieter?" Kazuya said, the stewardess looked at him and gave a naughty smile

"I'm heading to the restroom, It's quiet there, want to join me?" she asked as Kazuya gave a startled look and then turned into a glare,

" I'd rather stay here but maybe he's interested" Kazuya said pointing to Lee who's humming since he didn't know the lyrics.

Lee removed his headset as he saw the stewardess. "WHOA!" He yelled with surprised,

"The name's Lee Chaolan, What's yours honey?" Lee said, the stewardess smiled and winked at him as she went to the restroom, Lee followed afterwards.

"Finally, peace and quiet" He said, his voice in a satisfied tune.

"_What could Jun be doing right now? Will she forgive me?_" Kazuya thought, his mind started to wonder until he got drowsed.

The scene changed and He's already in Berlin and he saw Jun with Lei Wulong,

"JUN!" he called out, Jun looked at him with an uncomfortable smile

" Do I know you?" she asked, her voice was so angelic that made Kazuya like her more than he already did.

"It's me, Kazuya Mishima. I'm really sorry about those words" he said. Jun was surprised

"It's alright" Jun said as she walked closer to Kazuya,

"Hold it, She's mine, get lost!" Lei interrupted.

"Do you know who I am?" Kazuya said angrily,

"Yeah, you're Vegeta's biggest fan" Lei said Kazuya was so mad that he punched Lei with his thunder screw uppercut.

Jun looked at him and the flying-in-mid-air Lei. She smiled and went to him.

Kazuya was about to say something but just then, out of nowhere, Jun placed her hands on his cheek

"Kazuya…" she said but suddenly Jun yelled

"I'M NOT A PLUMBER!" with her voice somehow, changed into Lee's. Kazuya woke up panting and looked beside him to see Lee with an angry face.

He sighed as he realized that he's only dreaming "Good" Kazuya mumbled to himself.

"WHAT ARE YOU YELLING ABOUT? YOU DISTURBED MY PLEASANT DREAMS!" Kazuya yelled "THAT SICK STEWARDESS!" Lee said angrily

"Why? She refused to make out with you" Kazuya said "Kind of, She calls people pretending she wanted to make out but all she wants is someone who can help her unclog the sink!" Lee said very irritated, Kazuya burst out laughing,

"What's so funny?" Lee said as he sat down

"Plumber faggots are one of the laziest plumbers" Kazuya said as he continued to laugh.

"Yeah right, Don Lino" Lee said as he watched the T.V. that plays Shark Tale.

A few more hours and they arrived to London. In London, their eyes gazed everywhere.

"THIS PLACE HAS IT ALL" Paul said as he walked with Kazuya and Lee.

"I don't care, All I care about is seeing Jun" Kazuya commented, the two got startled and gave him a straight face.

"So, what are we going to do here now? This is NOT Berlin" Kazuya said.

"We could drink, flirt and have fun until we reach Berlin" Lee said,

"Your thoughts stink" Kazuya prompted,

"well, we better do something, this is a once in a lifetime trip" Paul said "Like what?" Lee said.

"There's no drinking age" Paul said with a grin. Kazuya ignored them while looking for a way to get to Berlin.

They went to the nearest bar and took some drinks as Kazuya stood outside. Suddenly his phone rang. it was Heihachi,

"What do you want, father?" Kazuya asked,

"Have you seen my thong-thingy?" Heihachi asked, a bit desperate. Kazuya can't help but laugh,

"Why are you asking me, Old fart?" Kazuya said.

"I have a feeling you have something to do with this…do you?" Heihachi said

"Why me? You're the only one who's wearing that disgusting thong" Kazuya said seriously.

"For your information that thong would show me victory in the 4th Tournament, that's according to my fortune teller…." Heihachi showed defense.

'_This old man really DOES deserve to die….' _Kazuya thought while listening to nagging Heihachi.

'_Yeah, yeah, yeah…blah-blah-blah'_ Kazuya interrupted with his thoughts _'When will this fart bomb shut up!' _Kazuya thought with an irritating look.

'_I've vowed to take my revenge sooner'_ he added.

"Are you done now?" Kazuya asked. "NO, and do you have any idea how much that thong costs?" Heihachi added

"uh… Father…You're 5 hours late from work" Kazuya prompted. "What do you mean?" Heihachi said.

"It's already 10 am and you're still in your pajamas nagging" Kazuya can't help but tell the wicked truth.

"ARGH! DARN IT!" Heihachi yelled.

"Whatever…" Kazuya said as he hung up the phone.

"That would keep him busy…now to find a way to get to Berlin…" Kazuya said to himself. Kazuya was about to leave when he heard singing inside the bar Paul and Lee went in.

'_Not another drunk idiots…' _he thought. Before he could enter, he was hit in the head with a bottle and was knocked out unconscious.

Somewhere in Berlin

"That Kazuya guy told things like that?" Lei said as he checked Jun's email

"I know… But he was the one…I wish to see him but he doesn't want to…" Jun said calmly

"maybe you should go look for someone else much better than that freak" Lei said

"You're a dream-come-true Lei" Jun said as she hugged Lei. Kazuya woke up "…It was just a dream…good…" He said

"Where am I?" he added "Oi!" a voice called out.

"We brought you here so you wouldn't miss the trip" the voice said. It was a man wearing jerseys, kind of like a sports hooligan.

"What trip?" Kazuya wondered "We're going to see the garlic-tossing freaks in Paris, are we boys?" The man said. Everyone cheered.

"Why did you knock me out?" Kazuya asked "You might refuse to come with us lad" Lee said.

"That's what I hate about you… You didn't ask me!" Kazuya yelled

"I know you'll refuse even before I ask you" Lee said

"You see, this is my brother, he's so in LOVE with his pen pal" Lee told the guy beside him.

"You dumb whoop ass! Jun is in Berlin! We're heading to Paris!" Kazuya panicked

"RELAX….we could go to Berlin from there…much easier" Lee said

"Nina and Anna are in Paris right? We could give them a call" Kazuya said as he grabbed his phone.

"Hey, Nina, I need you to meet us here in Paris since these two freaks led me in here in the first place!" Kazuya said as he talked to Nina.

"You will? Thanks" Kazuya said as he hung the phone.

"Good, we're safe from your own tricks" Kazuya said as the two chuckled. As they arrived, the hooligans left to kick some butt.

They were walking around Paris until they saw Anna and Nina. "Anna! Nina!" Paul called out.

"What brings you here anyway?" Anna asked.

"To tell you guys, Kazuya is desperate to be with his pen pal" Paul said.

"We just came from England because Lee here led us to this crap" Kazuya complained.

"At least we get to see England too as well" Lee said.

"Wow, I can't believe you came all around Europe just to see your pen pal" Anna commented

"That's some tight friendship you got, Mishima" Nina said.

"Actually, he thought Jun is a guy so he followed my advice and ruined everything" Lee interrupted.

"You ought to keep your mouth shut before I send my fist to your face" Kazuya said angrily.

"You came here for a girl? How sweet" Anna said, she was touched with the situation.

"So, who's this pen pal of yours?" Anna asked. "Jun Kazama, he-he" Lee said.

"Why do have to add the word "he-he" in your freaky sentence?" Kazuya said. Lee looked at him surprised

"A dumped faggot really does have many surprises" Kazuya commented.

"Shut up!" Lee replied.


	2. A Crazy day in Paris

**Disclaimer: I don't own Tekken and its characters, Pls. don't sue me (",)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Tekken and its characters, Pls. don't sue me (",)**

"I wonder why a faggot got dumped in the first place. Maybe she already knew right from the start that you're a rodent when it comes to women. Remember what she said about using you just to buy her a car, man that was pretty tough" Paul explained the details that made Lee boiling like a pot.

"Give it a rest Phoenix!" Lee yelled. Anna and Nina laughed. "I didn't know you're dumped, so that's why there's a song CHAOLAN DOESN'T KNOW" Nina said straight. Lee pouted and mumbled the word 'idiot'.

"By the way, are there only two of you?" Paul asked. "Nah, Marshall Law came along with us, He knows everything in Paris" Nina said.

"Oh, there he is" Anna said. "What's up? What are you guys doing here?" Marshall said. "Long story" Kazuya said "Kazuya wants to…" Before Lee could finish

"Tell the story and I'll bond your lips together with this glue I'm holding right now" Kazuya said angrily. "Since where in the world did you get that glue?" Paul asked "While you guys are on with the 'Friendship Moment' a man was walking by giving free samples of glue" Kazuya said.

"Weird" Paul said with raised eyebrows. "Anyway, that party was a crash, Marshall" Paul said. "Hey, We're going to College, this could be the last time we see each other" Marshall said.

"What in the world is that?" Lee pointed at the thing that's dangling in Marshall's neck. "It's a video camera phone, dimwit" Paul replied.

"I know! But it looks so small to be a video camera" Lee said "It's not just a video camera. it's a cell phone too." Marshall replied. "Can I see it?" Lee asked as he tried to grab the video camera.

"No can do" Marshall said as he slapped Lee's hand

"Ouch! You could tell me!" Lee yelled. "But you tried to grab it" Marshall replied.

"Whatever! We could buy things like that if we want to anyway" Lee replied.

"Great, now that we're in PARIS, what are we going to do now? EAT SNAILS?" Kazuya said

"Eat snails? Gross!" Marshall said.

A group of people stopped and walked beside Marshall, "Who are you?" Marshall asked

"You hate snails?" The tallest man said with a T-shirt that says 'We Love Snails'.

"Yes" Marshall said straight, "We hate snail-hating jerks" The shortest man said. "I don't think those people need any help" Lee said as he ran away screaming like a girl.

"As I thought, He IS a sissy faggot" Kazuya said as he showed his stance. Paul, Marshall, Anna and Nina did the same but the hooligans went back "Are these guys troubling you?" The sports hooligan said

"Yes, they are" Kazuya said calmly "I hate snail-eating puffs" the hooligan said as he called out his pals to beat the snail-loving freaks.

"While they're busy, we could go to the Louvre" Anna said "Fine" everyone said. In the Louvre, a huge line met their gaze.

"Should we wait here or should we just find a train to get to Berlin?" Kazuya said annoyed. Marshall was using his video camera. "Here we are, at the long line of The Louvre" Marshall narrated.

"There's Nina, Anna, a faggot, a shark, a broom and the most handsome guy in the whole world, me" Marshall said as he faced the video camera to himself. The three looked at him except Nina and Anna.

"That's some tight introduction you did, now how did a broom and a shark get in there?" Paul asked. "The most handsome guy in the world, huh" Kazuya said glaring at him. "I'm not a faggot" Lee said as Paul and Kazuya looked at him.

"What now?" Lee asked angrily. "It's true" both of them said. Lee growled and looked away. "I'm just having fun" Marshall said.

"Hey, we could check the Eiffel Tower too" Anna said. "Let's just get out of here, this wood-like thing is freaking me out" Lee said while looking at a dancing wood with a name that says 'Mokujin'.

"Why? He's just doing it for his wood family" Marshall said "Or maybe he's a walking slogan to help save trees" Paul said

"or maybe he's just looking for trouble" Kazuya added. Marshall walked beside Mokujin "Faggot, do not hate me" Marshall said in a robotic voice.

"I'm a tree and I'm programmed to be…Freaky" Marshall said as he gave a wink and started dancing like a tree waving its leafy arms. Mokujin walked closer to Marshall

"That's not a tree dance" Mokujin said in a tree language (like in Tekken 5). "What?" Marshall asked

"That's not a tree dance" Mokujin said in a tree language. "Wait, what?" Marshall asked as he cleaned his ear. Mokujin lost patience and copied Marshall's stance "What the!" Marshall got startled. 'A copy cat, eh?" Marshall thought.

"This is a waste of time" Kazuya complained and started to think about Jun. 'I'm coming Jun, just a few more irritating hours' Kazuya thought,

He remembered her angelic messages that almost sounded like her voice but his thoughts got cut off when he heard someone said 'ROUND 1: FIGHT' (Tekken style).

"Marshall's fighting with a tree? Man, that's so embarrassing" Paul said.

"You're a second rate trying hard copycat!" Marshall said as he continued to fight.

"This is nonsense" Kazuya said annoyed.

"Can we leave him?" Kazuya asked. "I'd like to but he's the only one who knows Paris much better" Paul whispered. "Watching a possessed Bruce Lee is my only choice" Kazuya said irritated. The fight ended when Marshall kicked Mokujin in the groin. The people gave him applause.

"My wooden bs" Mokujin said in a tree language as he rolled in the floor. "Lee, there you are where have you been?" Marshall asked "I didn't know this faggot went out for a walk" Kazuya teased

"I bought a CHAINSAW!" Lee said as he activated his chainsaw, Mokujin saw the chainsaw and ran away

"YOU WANT A PIECE OF ME? HUH? WOODY!" Lee yelled as he held the chainsaw in triumph. 'Now I'm watching a possessed faggot' Kazuya thought.

"YEAH RUN AWAY!" Lee yelled as he deactivated his chainsaw.

"So..." Before Lee could say anything, all of the people left except them.

"Now we can see the Louvre" Lee said "At first, the faggot has done something good" Kazuya said straight.

"I'm good, am I?" Lee said with confidence.

"Only this day" Paul said.

Inside the Louvre, Their eyes feast among the beautiful paintings, except Kazuya who's feasting his thoughts upon seeing Jun sooner.

"Ever wondered how Mona Lisa got her mysterious smile?" Marshall asked all of a sudden.

"I was told that Leonardo Da Vinci was gay, during their times, gay people are executed. So, he drew himself as a woman. Look at the resemblance, Mona Lisa looks like Da Vinci with the exceptions of the eyebrows" Lee explained.

"And now you're spreading rumors about that! You're evil!" Anna said angrily

"You're so lucky Lee, They don't execute faggots anymore this time" Paul said

"Hey, Quit it!" Lee yelled. "Well, I suggest you should draw yourself without eyebrows and post it everywhere and name it MONA LEE SA, but, to prevent wasting paint, you could just admit it, Da Vinci paints better than you" Kazuya teased. Everyone laughed except Lee.

"MONA LEE SA is a good name" Marshall said as he laughed hysterically.

"Ha-ha, I'm so amused" Lee said that made Kazuya think he changed his tune in a girlish way.

"See, now you're showing it" Kazuya said as he chuckled.

"Let's just get out of here. Mona Lisa is making fun of me as well" Lee said calmly

"And now you're blaming a painting" Paul said. "Whatever you say" Lee said as he left the Louvre. "I almost killed a tree for this? Whatever" Marshall said 'he-he, I got this moment on cam anyway' Marshall thought. They left and went to the train station. Inside the train, everyone was teasing Lee

"MONA LEE SA" Paul said calmly and started laughing together with Marshall, Nina and Anna. Lee ignored him. Anna was humming the song 'CHAOLAN DOESN'T KNOW' and Lee glared at her

"what? You got to admit it it's a catchy tune" Anna said as she continued to hum. Everyone is humming except Kazuya who's silently looking at Jun's photo again. Marshall is reviewing the videos he took while laughing.

"Give it a rest, you guys" Lee said annoyed. A middle-aged man with a magazine suddenly walked to their compartment.

"Bongiorno" he greeted. Everyone just gave a nod. He sat beside Paul, Marshall and Kazuya.

"This compartment is full. could you change to other vacant ones?" Paul suggested the man only looked at him.

"I don't think he understands you" Nina said. They've come across a tunnel, as they got out of the tunnel the man's hand is resting on Marshall's knee.

"Kazuya, look" Lee called Kazuya, he was uneasy with the situation. 'Gross' he thought.

"Pardon me, but your hand is resting on my knee" Marshall said nervously

"Ah, Mi Scuzi" The man apologized Paul hurriedly got up and transferred seats leaving Kazuya and Marshall behind. He continued reading the magazine. They've come across another tunnel. As they went out, the man was caressing Marshall's hair

"What are you doing!" Marshall yelled "Mi Scuzi" The man said as he continued to caress Marshall's hair

"NO! LET GO OF MY HAIR!" Marshall panicked.

"Oh no, big tunnel" Paul said. Kazuya looked at the sign and stood. In the big tunnel, they're all screaming

"HELP!" Paul yelled "WHO'S TOUCHING ME!" Anna yelled "I can do everything I want, he-he" Lee said

"Shut up!" everyone yelled.

"HEY! LET GO OF MY COAT!" Kazuya yelled.

"I'M MOLESTED BY A GAY!" Marshall screamed

"LEE, THAT'S NOT A GOOD DECISION" Paul yelled. "I'M OVER HERE, I'M STUCK!" Lee yelled.

"Where's my night goggles?" Nina asked. As they escaped the tunnel, everyone was sitting on the other side, in Lee, Anna and Nina's place while the man got the seats all by himself wearing only his boxers

"Mi Scuzi" He said. They threw him outside the compartment then they locked the door. "That sick pervert" Marshall said annoyed.

"I thought it was Lee" Paul said.

"My photo almost got lost!" Kazuya yelled "Can we see?" Ann said as Kazuya gave her the photo

"She's good looking, I like her hair" Anna said. "I sure hope you're telling the truth Anna or I'll choke you to death" Kazuya said calmly

"Of course, you could easily tell if I'm lying" Anna proved it. "Fine" Kazuya gave a sigh. "So this is this entire trip's about" Marshall said happily,

"We'll help you find her" Marshall said "I want to see this in reality, I'm with you" Anna said

"Since when did you start watching romantic movies?" Nina asked

"I never watch, I just want to be involved" Anna said as she flickered her eyelashes. Kazuya looked at her straight-faced

"right…" he said.

" We're in too" Paul said "I'm in and I'm also looking for some European babes" Lee said, nobody reacted.

"Well, I'm in" Lee added "that's the spirit" Paul said as he nudged Lee. Paul didn't notice he used all of his strength, Lee was left unconscious.

"I guess I hit him too hard for his sassy bones" Paul said teasingly as he laughed.

"You don't know how right you are" Kazuya said. All of them chuckled. 'A few more crazy days and I'll be seeing you Jun' Kazuya thought.

**"They had a crazy day in Paris, what happens next? Find out in the next chapter"**


	3. Nudist beach chase

**Disclaimer: I don't own Tekken so Pls. don't sue me (",) I just wrote this fic to ease my boredom. But I got carried away (hehe)… Enjoy reading this hilarious fic.**

The train stopped at the nearest train station.

"The next train will arrive within 4 hours" Kazuya said gritting his teeth. "We can't just stay here doing nothing" Paul said.

The gang stood in silence

"So, what's the plan for today?" Anna asked to break the silence.

"I'm taking a nap, wake me up when the train gets here" Lee said as he lay down in the bench

"We could go to the monument…" Before Marshall could finish,

"Oh no, not another educational-fieldtrip-of-making-fun-Lee again" Lee cut him off.

"There's a nude beach here, let's check it out" Paul said.

"Whatever you say… Just make sure we get to Berlin" Kazuya said expressionless.

"Okay, we can't just take a nap here, let's check that place" Lee said as he stood up.

"That made him say yes" Marshall said to Nina, Nina just shrugged.

In the nudist beach, Kazuya, Marshall, Paul and Lee were walking in their boxers.

"Why is this happening to me?" Kazuya said feeling uneasy.

"Why? Afraid to be seen with no clothes on?" Lee said.

Kazuya just looked at him

" Your confidence is getting on my nerves in case you didn't know" Kazuya said calmly

Lee raised an eyebrow.

"Does nude beach mean we have to get naked too?" Paul asked

"Of course" Lee said full of confidence

"You're kidding me aren't you?" Kazuya said with raised eyebrows.

""Is the word 'NUDE' new to you?" Lee asked the irritated Kazuya.

"Picture this, Was my-fist-getting-to-your-face-if-you-say-anythingNEW to you?"Kazuya said giving a heavy emphasis on the word 'new'

"Think about this as a once in a lifetime experience" Lee said, he has his confidence speeding up.

"I only came for Jun, not ending up getting naked together with freaks like you." Kazuya complained.

"Whatever, let's just do it" Lee said.

"But… I can't just leave my boxers here" Marshall said, he was feeling uneasy.

"Carry it with you" Lee said.

"Fine" Marshall, Kazuya and Paul chorused.

"Let the European babes chase us" Lee said calmly

"When will your hunting slow down!" Marshall said angrily.

"Okay, on a count of five" Paul said.

"Make it three!" Lee yelled.

"You're too excited to get naked" Kazuya said calmly.

Lee chuckled.

"Fine, three" Paul gave up.

"Three, two, one" Paul counted.

Only Lee removed his boxers.

"AH! MY EYES ARE DECEIVING ME" Marshall panicked.

Kazuya and Paul started laughing at the pissed off Lee.

" Are you circ..." Paul was cut off by Lee

"Again! seriously" Lee said.

"Three, two…" Paul, Marshall and Lee removed their boxers except Kazuya who's still standing beside them.

"Now I've seen everything" Kazuya said expressionless.

"Kazuya!" the three shouted.

"You didn't say one" Kazuya answered back.

"ONE" Lee yelled. Kazuya quickly removed his boxers then he covered himself with it.

"HELLO EUROPEAN BABES!" Lee shouted but he got startled.

The people looked at him.

"Seeing naked ladies lately?" the old naked man asked.

"No" the three of them said.

"But there IS one here, the one with the silver hair" Kazuya teased as he laughed evilly.

"Ignore him" Lee prompted.

Kazuya wore his boxers back leaving the three naked.

'Where are the women?' Lee thought. He was disappointed.

According to my guidebook, they're already chased away by male tourists" Marshall explained.

"Another waste of time" Kazuya mumbled.

"The international house of…sausages" Paul said in disgust.

"Hey guys!" Anna and Nina called out.

They were wearing bikinis.

The three quickly put their boxers on

'Should've done that awhile ago' Kazuya thought.

"Look Lee, ladies, happy now?" Kazuya said. he was pissed off.

"Nina…Anna…" Lee was thunderstruck to see the two

"What has got into that boy?" Paul asked.

"There are only guys, so I suggest we leave now" Kazuya interrupted.

"If this is a nude beach, then I'll take these off" Anna said as she tried to take off her bikini.

"NO!" Paul and Marshall yelled.

The naked men saw Nina and Anna

"hey ladies! Wait!" the men said.

Kazuya and the gang ran away

'now this is even more ridiculous' Kazuya thought

"cover up, let's go!" Nina yelled.

They were chased by naked men until they found a bus.

"That was close…" Paul sighed.

"Good thing they haven't mistaken Lee for a girl" Kazuya teased.

Lee just ignored him.

Aminute later, his phone rang.

"Hello, Father?" Kazuya was startled, it was Heihachi.

"Kazuya, I'm on a vacation, he-he" Heihachi said, trying to brag his experience.

"We are too, you don't have to brag, old fart" Kazuya answered back.

"To tell you, I'm going to a nude beach in Europe, ho-ho" Heihachi bragged again.

"Good, now guys would be able to see your great wrinkled butt" Kazuya said.

"What are you talking about?" Heihachi wondered.

"You'll see" Kazuya said as he hung up the phone. "What's up?" Marshall asked

"Father is going to a nudist beach, THIS nudist beach, he's actually following us coincidentally" Kazuya said as he laughed evilly.

'What's with the laugh?' Lee thought.

"Anyway, let's get back to the train station" Kazuya said. Everyone nodded.

"**Where are they heading next? Was Heihachi following them or just coincidence? I'll update soon"**

**reviewsreviewsreviews (dances around)**

**Kazuya: psycho...**

**Me: Shut up!**


	4. Amsterdamdamdamdam

**Disclaimer: I don't own Tekken (again). This hilarious fic is driving me to write more (he-he). Lee isn't really gay, though. The gang just loved teasing him around especially Kazuya. Without Lee, the trip won't be hilarious (hehe). Thanks for the review. I think I made this chap too long. Enjoy!**

In the bus, Kazuya was really pissed.

Marshall is getting everyone on cam again.

Paul was drinking a canned soda.

Anna and Nina are fighting again and Lee is taking a nap.

They're the only passengers in the bus

"I hate this day" Kazuya said annoyed.

"At least we get to see it, only…the ladies are gone" Paul replied.

"Here we are, at the bus, everyone is minding their own business. Lee is taking a nap while…smiling, wonder what he's dreaming about.

Next we have Nina and Anna, fighting…again.

We have Paul Phoenix here drinking a soda that has an expiry date of…today.

We have Kazuya frowning at one edge, must've been lovesick and we have me, the one who's using the cam" Marshall narrated lazily.

He's obviously bored. Paul spit the soda out of his mouth

"This soda's expired?" Paul yelled. "Just kidding" Marshall answered back.

"Man you made me spilled my drink!" Paul glared at him.

"You can't blame me, I'm bored…" Marshall answered back.

"Then do something else as well as telling me my drink is expired!" Paul yelled.

"I know!" A light bulb appeared beside Marshall's head.

He silently sat beside Lee and took out his video camera phone.

"This is a live show of how homosexuals known as the Lee behave towards bored humans" Marshall said calmly holding back his laughter.

"A live discovery channel right here? Man, you really ARE bored" Paul commented.

"Watch as I silently put camera closer to the sleeping being" Marshall said (in a discovery channel narrator's voice).

Lee moved a bit.

"He seemed to be triggered to the camera's presence" Marshall continued.

Everyone except Kazuya was holding back their laughter.

'What in the world are these people doing now' he thought.

He stood and walked to them, as he got closer, he can't help but laugh.

"Now let's observe the Lee's silver hair. Rare, isn't it?" Marshall was having fun.

"I've seen a real Discovery Channel but this is ridiculous" Anna said as she started chuckling silently.

"Let's have a look at his face… human-like, eh? It's because he's a hermaphrodite" Marshall was getting carried away.

Everyone had been laughing silently.

"Lees are gentle creatures, you could tease them since they can only hurt you through words" Marshall added.

'Is this some kind of gay zoo?' Kazuya wondered. Paul kept laughing.

"Lees are dangerous when they got dumped, they're mostly hot-headed but it would wear off, the question is, why was a gay dumped in the first place?" Marshall was starting to laugh at his words.

"You've took the words right out of my mouth" Paul said silently. Lee moved his head at one side.

"Observe. Lee sleeps like a princess" Marshall said.

Everyone can't help but laugh out loud.

The bus arrived at the bus stop.

"And that's how a Lee behaves" Marshall ended.

"Aw man! To think that we're starting to have some fun" Paul whined.

The gang went back to the train station with the help of the bus.

"That was close…" Marshall felt relieved.

"Hey, the train's here" Nina said gesturing them to come over.

'Finally' Kazuya thought.

"Where's Lee?" Marshall wondered.

"There he is" Paul said pointing at the running Lee.

"Have a nice dream?" Kazuya asked.

"You COULD wake me up you know!" Lee yelled.

Paul started humming Evanescence's 'Bring me to Life' chorus.

"Quit it Phoenix!" Lee yelled. Paul just chuckled.

Inside the train, the gang was so exhausted.

"I never felt so tired before" Anna said.

"Those naked men are crazy!" Nina complained.

"Look before you leap, anyway, it's over" Marshall stated. "A bunch of crazy men led us to a bus actually" Lee was thankful.

"And you're thankful about it? Those men could make an origami out of our genitals too in case you didn't know!" Kazuya complained. "He's right though" Paul answered.

"That discovery channel was fun, let's do it again" Anna suggested.

"What discovery channel?" Lee wondered.

"While you're asleep, we watched Discovery Channel live" Paul answered.

"Why didn't you woke me up?" Lee said angrily.

"I thought you hated an educational-field trip-of-making-fun-of-Lee" Nina replied.

"Okay, what's that Field trip about?" Lee asked as he pouted.

"A creature called, The Lee" Kazuya said, as he laughed.

"What's The Lee?" Lee wondered stupefied.

"A creature that has silver hair, sensitive and an idiot" Paul said.

"I wish I could see it" Lee said sadly.

'What an idiot' Kazuya thought.

'He has no freakin' idea it was him' Paul thought.

'I wish to see more, if only Lee's asleep' Anna thought.

'I need to think of some crazy gay stuff in case Lee falls asleep again' Marshall thought.

'No possible comments' Nina thought.

A few hours have passed, the train still hasn't stopped.

Paul, Lee, Nina and Anna are exhausted. they're all taking a nap.

'Darn it Low battery!' Marshall thought.

"Kazuya, you looked kinda' down today" Marshall's attention moved to Kazuya.

"I'm eager to see Jun" Kazuya prompted.

"I guess she's eager to see you too. You know, maybe she'll consider you the 'ONE'" Marshall commented.

Kazuya just stared blankly into space

"I wish that would happen. I've never been the ONE before" he replied almost in a whisper blown in the air.

"That's not what I meant" Marshall said breaking Kazuya's dreams.

"I meant to say the ONLY one, not like in Lee's situation, he's in a 101" Marshall continued. Kazuya was confused by that thought

"now I get it…" he replied.

Somewhere in Berlin...

"I'm so depressed, I wish Kazuya was here. He's my only friend" Jun was seen in her room hugging her stuffed panda.

"Jun, I've come for you" Kazuya went in all of a sudden.

"I'm really sorry about the things I told you. Please leave Lei Wulong and be with me forever" Kazuya pleaded.

"It's over, me and Lei were through. I broke up with him awhile ago just for you" Jun said happily

"awhile ago?" Kazuya wondered.

"Let's forget him, stay with me, you're my only one" Jun said pulling Kazuya close to her.

Kazuya was unable to speak since Jun had her lips locked with his.

He kissed back passionately. Jun broke the kiss and whispered the words 'besa me mucho' several times.

"Kazuya wake up!" he heard Marshall's voice out of nowhere.

It came out that he was only dreaming. he felt his face moist a bit.

As he woke up, he gave Marshall a death glare

"First Lee, then you!" Kazuya said provoked.

"Man, look beside you before you hit me" Marshall said silently, everyone's asleep except them.

Kazuya looked beside him and was shocked to see the middle-aged man hugging him, licking his face like a dog kissing its owner.

"Ah, Mi Scuzi" the man said.

"AH!" Kazuya yelled in shock, he didn't realize it woke everybody up.

As they saw the man, they panicked and screamed around like their compartment is on fire.

"DISGUSTING!" Kazuya yelled as he wiped his face thoroughly.

"THE PERVERT IS BACK!" Marshall panicked.

"HELP US!" Anna yelled

"I DON'T WANT TO DIE!" Lee all of a sudden yelled out loud.

Everyone looked at him including the man.

"Now how did dying get in here?" Paul asked confused.

"Whatever…" Lee answered back and started yelling like a sissy girl.

Everyone is in a middle of panic for 3 minutes.

The train arrived safely at the station in Amsterdam. All of them hastily ran away to the exit.

"Finally…" Marshall said in relief.

"Perverted psycho" Paul complained.

Nina and Anna stood with a disgusted look.

"So where the heck are we now? I know this is STILL not Berlin" Kazuya gave up a word.

"Are you kidding? This is Amsterdam! This is Europe's Red Lite District!" Lee excitedly yelled.

"So?" everyone said in unison.

"I'm finally going to have my dreams come true" Lee said, his eyes glowing with bliss.

"Great, I'm going to have my dreams come undone" Kazuya said straight-faced.

"Maybe we could stay in the hotel, if there is any" Nina insisted. "Let's just explore" Marshall said

"You're right, the train doesn't leave till tomorrow" Paul agreed. Nina, Anna and Kazuya still haven't decided.

"Fine, we'll go!" they chorused.

"Great!" Lee cheered.

"Okay, let's begin with… I know I'll go to this five star club, who wants to go with me?" Lee asked, nobody responded.

"Fine, I'll go myself, let's meet up in the train station" Lee said as he went away.

"I'll buy a cell phone casing" Marshall said as he left.

"Nina and I will just roam around" Anna said as she pulled Nina.

"So, there's just you and me" Paul said.

"I found no interest in this place, actually, this place smells like a whorehouse" Kazuya complained.

"Get used to it man, you can't see this place anymore once we get to Berlin" Paul insisted, he's enjoying the place as well.

"What are you planning to do?" Kazuya asked. he's bored.

"They're selling foods with…you know….the thing that gets you on high" Paul whispered.

"I agree just to do something" Kazuya agreed. In the shop where Marshall went, he saw a colostomy bag

"This might come in handy" he said happily as he bought it.

"Next up, cell phone shop" he said as he went to a shop that sells phone casings.

"That's an odd looking cell phone you got there?" the Chinese cashier asked.

"Yeah, with a built in video camera too" Marshall said proudly.

"Amazing, I've never seen anything like it" the cashier said surprised.

"It's from Japan actually. Anyway, do you have a casing for it and a travel battery charger?" Marshall asked.

The Chinese cashier showed him some casings and batteries yet he was distracted by her face.

'She's cute' he thought

"Um… in case I'm the only costumer here, do you want to see the videos I took?" Marshall insisted.

The Chinese cashier nodded happily "sure!" she said.

In the club, Lee was feasting his eyes over the beautiful women around him.

"I love this place" he said calmly.

His attention went to a woman sitting alone, she was unhappy.

"Excuse me, if you don't mind, Maybe we could go on a date or something" Lee asked, he gave his entire gentle attitude.

"Okay" she said calmly as she walked with Lee hand in hand. 'Jackpot!' Lee thought.

Nina and Anna are roaming around.

"Now that we're roaming here, there's nothing special about this place!" Nina complained.

"Let's eat some brownies I'm hungry!" Anna said excitedly.

"Okay" Nina gave up. Inside the bakeshop, they ate a lot.

"Nina…I'm feeling kind of strange…" Anna said. She's becoming dizzy.

"Oh no! TWO ANNAS!" Nina panicked.

She's hallucinating.

"I feel so hungry…" Anna complained

"HEY WAITER! GIVE ME SOME FOOD HERE!" Anna yelled.

"There's no waiter here. You two must've eaten a lot" the storekeeper said.

"What have we eaten?" Nina asked confused

"hash brownies" the man said calmly.

"What'rehash brownies?" Anna asked.

"Brownies that makes you…high" The man answered.

"WHAT?" Nina and Anna yelled. They jumped at the storekeeper and beat the living daylights out of him.

"THIS IS FOR SHUTTING UP!" Nina said as she kicked him in the gut

"AND THIS IS FOR MAKING US HIGH!" Anna said as she kicked him in the head.

The man lay on the floor unconscious.

"What are you looking at?" Anna said

"Shut up!" Nina yelled.

They started fighting again, this time, tables are involved.

They looked like they're in a wrestling arena.

Back to Paul and Kazuya, they ate the same as Nina and Anna ate.

"I ATE TOO MUCH!" Paul yelled. He stood in the table.

"I swear I don't feel anything" Kazuya said calmly.

"HEY I'M ON A HIGH! COME AND GET ME!" Paul yelled.

'This is embarrassing' Kazuya thought.

"…get down from there. You're pulling my last nerve!" Kazuya said irritated.

"I need to tell you something… I saw a porno once, I didn't know until halfway in, THE WOMEN ARE GAY, THE WOMEN ARE GAY! WHAT A NIGHTMARE!" Paul yelled on the top of his lungs.

"AW MAN KAZUYA! IF ONLY YOU COULD SEE HOW HORRIBLE IT WAS! IT WAS MY FIRST TIME!" Paul continued as he began break dancing in the table.

Kazuya stood and looked at him stupefied.

"What are you doing broom head?" The waiter asked.

"You gave us…" Before Paul could finish, Kazuya cut his words out.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'US'?" Kazuya yelled

"I mean you gave ME a bad batch of brownies!" Paul was indeed overreacting.

"These are not hash brownies, now get down from that table broom head" the waiter said.

"Come on Paul, let's get out of here!" Kazuya yelled pulling Paul as he went out.

"So…embarrassing…" Paul said

"You embarrassed me more than you thought!" Kazuya said angrily.

Kazuya and Paul rounded up the gang to find a hotel.

"Let's begin with the faggot" Paul suggested.

"If I were a faggot in which it would never happen, where would I go?" Kazuya said as he glanced around his surroundings.

"Look! In the train station" Paul said pointing to someone.

Lee was sitting alone with a very pissed off face.

"What now?" Paul asked. Lee growled irritated.

"How come every time I hook up with women I always end up getting the worse!" Lee said angrily.

"What happened?" Kazuya asked.

"The woman I dated was a she-male!" Lee yelled yet he has no idea who he's talking to.

"It's because you're a fag as well…" Paul said silently.

He was starting to make fun of Lee. "What the! Kazuya? Paul?" Lee was surprised.

"Guess again…" Paul said. Kazuya and Paul both laughed hysterically.

"I guess you have a strong sexual appeal when it comes to faggots" Kazuya teased.

"Shut up!" Lee replied.

"Enough with this, we got to find a hotel somewhere" Kazuya said.

"Come on Lee, let's find the others" Paul said. Lee just nodded and followed them.

"I heard Marshall is going to some cell phone shop" Paul said as they went to the shop.

As they entered, no one's around.

"They're not here" Lee said.

"Impossible, Marshall shops for 1 and a half hours." Paul said.

"Well…somebody left the backdoor open" Kazuya said pointing to the half-opened back door.

He quickly kicked the door and ended up seeing Marshall making out with the Chinese cashier.

"Play time's over Marshall…" Kazuya said.

"How come he gets to make out?" Lee whined.

"Maybe that's why you shop for 1 and a half hours" Paul said.

"Whatever. Where next?" Marshall asked.

"Let's find a hotel" Kazuya said.

"Call me" the Chinese cashier said as Marshall and the others left.

"So, there's only Anna and Nina" Kazuya said.

"They said they're just going to roam around" Paul said.

"They're giving us a hard time" Marshall said.

"Hey look!" Lee said pointing to the bake shop.

As they entered, the place looked like rubble.

Nina and Anna are asleep beside the two broken chairs.

"You two wake up!" Paul called out to them.

"What happened to you guys?" Marshall wondered.

"That shop keeper gave us a bad batch of hash brownies!" Nina yelled

"aw man! I could've had one of those" Paul said.

"Not a chance while I'm around" Kazuya said as he glared at Paul.

The gang went out to find a hotel to stay.

"There's one" Lee said pointing to a small hotel.

They went inside and were surprised since the receptionist just popped out from the table.

"Hello welcome to Amsterdam's luxurious hotel." The man said.

"Sounds good" Marshall said.

"How much?" Kazuya asked.

"About $190" the man said.

"Tight prize" Paul commented.

"Fine" Kazuya said as he gave the man $190.

"Strange, why do I feel scared" Anna said as she reached for Lee's arm by accident.

Lee looked at her and grinned. Anna saw him and slapped him.

"Your key" the man said giving them the key with a number in it.

"Um… we're taking a separate room, we're women!" Nina said.

"Sorry". The man said as he gave them a key.

"That would be $190" the man said as Nina hand him the money.

"You wouldn't have to pay if you stayed with us" Paul said

"in your dreams!" Nina said angrily.

As the gang went inside, the man gave a weird horrifying grin.

"What!" Kazuya looked at the man irritated.

"Nothing, Enjoy your stay…" the man said,

Kazuya walked away confused.

The man grinned as Kazuya left.

Kazuya looked again.

The man gave an innocent face.

Kazuya shrugged and walked away.

"…while you can…" the man added then he grinned again.

'Psychopath' Kazuya thought.

**"What will happen during their stay? Was the receptionist up to something? I'll update soon**

**Me:** Success! Chapter 4 is done! What do you think?

**Kazuya**: I hate that Mr. Grin… Anyway, that make out scene with Jun in my dream could've been better if it wasn't for that PERVERTED MIDDLE-AGED MAN!

**Lee**: Why did Anna slapped me?

**Anna**: Why did Lee stand beside me! It should've been someone else!

**Paul**: Everyone calls me broom head!

**Marshall**: I want another discovery channel!

**Nina**: I hate hash brownies

**Me**: man, these guys are a pain! (he-he). Better write more…Adios!


	5. TrickforTreat

**Disclaimer: Here we go. I don't own Tekken so please don't sue me (",). The last chapter was kind of stupid with the Discovery Channel about Lee. Marshall was just bored. Anyway, I just added it for fun (hehe). Enjoy! **

The gang went inside the Amsterdam's luxurious hotel. Kazuya walked with Paul, Marshall and Lee to their rooms. Nina and Anna did the same.

"What number was it again Kazuya?" Lee asked

"Room 302" Kazuya replied.

'I don't like the sound of that' Marshall thought.

"Does this place have to be so quiet?" Lee said in an uneasy tune.

Kazuya finally opened their room.

They quietly went inside and dropped their baggage in the floor.

Paul quickly opened the lights.

"This isn't so bad" Paul said.

"Have you noticed something about that receptionist?" Kazuya asked.

"No, why?" Paul wondered.

"It makes me want to punch the living daylights out of him" Kazuya replied angrily.

"Your thoughts are always full of violence" Lee replied.

"Thank you, glad you noticed" Kazuya said in his calmest tune which made Lee nervous.

"So, what're we going to do here now, I'm still not sleepy" Marshall complained.

"We could watch a movie" Paul said as he pointed at the television.

"Cool" Lee said. Kazuya walked to the balcony 'How long will I have to wait to see Jun?' he thought.

"What is this tape?" Paul wondered as he picked up a blank tape.

"It has no name..." Marshall replied.

"Why don't we check it out" Lee said.

Back to Anna and Nina,

"Here we are, Room 304" Anna said as she and Nina went in.

Nina opened the lights and was surprised to see two dolls.

The first doll has stitches. the other one has blonde hair.

"What are these hideous-looking midgets doing in our room?" Nina said angrily.

"I don't know, maybe someone left it here, but this blonde haired doll looks so adorable" Anna said.

"Whatever" Nina said as she dropped their baggage and went to the bathroom.

"Hi, I'm chucky, want to play?" the doll with stitches said.

Anna giggled and hugged the two dolls.

Back to the guys,

"Why did you play it Marshall!" Paul said

"What's up with you guys?" Marshall replied.

"Someone once told me that there's a cursed blank videotape, if you watch it, the phone will ring saying you'll die in seven days" Lee said.

Marshall's jaw dropped.

"What are we going to do now?" Paul said nervously.

The videotape played. They all covered their eyes but they got startled when they heard the background music

"'Heihachi's Funniest Videos'?" Marshall read the title.

Paul sighed. "Now how did that get in there?"

"Just for entertainment I suppose. Almost everyone wants to ridicule Heihachi" Marshall said.

Lee raised an eyebrow

"Now THIS is interesting" he said.

Heihachi Mishima is seen at the delivery room walking in circles.

"Poor Heihachi, he's REALLY bored, he pretends he's in a Ferris wheel" Marshall said.

Heihachi is seen talking to the doctor then started jumping around the hall.

"Now he pretends he's a kangaroo, poor Roger" Paul said.

Heihachi is seen holding little Kazuya's collar beside a cliff.

"He was bitten by a mosquito in the hand so he threw Kazuya off the cliff to scratch his hand.

"So this is the reason why Kazuya hated Heihachi so much" Paul said.

Kazuya was behind them

"Stupid father! He didn't know there were mosquitoes in that area, he forgot to use an OFF lotion (a lotion to prevent mosquito bites)." Kazuya said angrily.

"Sorry…" the three of them said.

The movie ended afterwards.

"That's it?" Paul complained

"Let's watch another one" Marshall said as he placed another videotape to the player.

The movie was entitled Constantine (by Keanu Reeves).

A few hours have passed.

"That movie was two thumbs up!" Lee said.

"Nice movie…" Kazuya said satisfied.

"I like it!" Paul said.

"Let's watch another one" Marshall said as he grabbed an odd-looking videotape and played it.

A well was seen and a weird image is shown then the movie ended.

"I don't understand a single thing" Marshall said as he rewinds it.

Back to Nina and Anna, They were asleep.

The doll with stitches started to move

"Tiff, wake up" the doll said waking the other doll.

"Chucky, what's wrong?" the other doll said.

"That nosy b called us midgets!" Chucky said.

"I like the other one, she likes us" Tiffany said.

"Whatever, I want to have some fun" Chucky said as he grabbed the knife in his pocket.

He silently crawled to Nina's side.

"Bye, bye, b" Chucky said.

Before he could stab Nina, Anna woke up and started yelling.

Chucky ran away.

"What now!" Nina said angrily.

"Th-the dolls… They're alive!" Anna said.

"You're just dreaming!" Nina said angrily.

"Nina, look beside you!" Anna said pointing to Nina's side.

Chucky raised an eyebrow.

"What the f are you looking at b?" Chucky said rudely.

Nina and Anna yelled and ran away carrying their baggage.

Back to the guys,

"I still don't understand a thing" Lee said.

A telephone rang after the movie.

"Could it be…? THAT'S THE CURSED VIDEOTAPE!" Lee yelled as Marshall and Paul panicked.

Kazuya answered the phone.

"Hello. Father?" Kazuya said.

The three stopped panicking and sighed.

"Kazuya, I'm going to watch a movie, ho-ho" Heihachi said.

"What movie?" Kazuya wondered.

"A movie called Constantine, it's not yet showing in Japan" Heihachi said happily.

"Oh, that movie, Anyway, John Constantine committed suicide but the heaven won't accept him. He's supposed to go in hell but he's done good deeds to repay his sin." Kazuya spoiled the movie

"YOU SPOILED IT ALL!" Heihachi said angrily.

Kazuya laughed.

"Anyway, where are you now?" Kazuya asked.

"I'm in Amsterdam's luxurious hotel" Heihachi said

'this art of coincidence is getting on my nerves' Kazuya thought.

"Great, whatever, bye" Kazuya said as he hung the phone.

"Father is here" Kazuya said as he grinned.

The room's telephone rang all of a sudden.

"Hello" Lee answered.

"Seven days" the voice said. Lee screamed.

"What? Who is it?" Paul asked

"WE WATCHED THE CURSED VIDEOTAPE!" Lee said.

Everyone except Kazuya began to look pale.

"What are we going to do?" Marshall said nervously.

"What's wrong with you people?" Kazuya said angrily.

"That videotape will kill us within seven days…" Lee said.

"Oh…" Kazuya said as he began to look pale as well.

"I don't want to die without seeing Jun" Kazuya said calmly.

The room started to get dark, the curtains flew vigorously.

The television turned on with a well in it.

"I hate this hotel" Paul said.

"That's it!" Kazuya suddenly returned to his normal state.

"What?" Lee asked.

"That phone is only capable for hotel service use only" Kazuya said pointing to the phone.

"That means…" Paul wondered.

"The receptionist is the one who called us, notice the tape we just watched" Kazuya said

"It just says 'a weird image' and the well looks like a toilet bowl" Marshall said.

"Exactly as I thought, he thinks we're stupid enough" Kazuya said.

"I know who needs some beating" Kazuya added as he and the guys went out of the room.

"What about the television, should we turn it off?" Marshall said out of the blue.

Everyone looked at him with raised eyebrows.

"Hey, Anna and Nina are outside as well" Nina and Anna are outside pushing the door.

Heihachi went out too.

The three groups were surprised to see each other.

"Kazuya the dolls….the dolls…." Anna said nervously pointing to the room they're pushing their backs in.

"Be qui…Kazuya? Lee?" Heihachi asked surprised.

"We'll talk about this later, but first, I need to kill someone" Kazuya said as he and the gang down to see the receptionist who seems to be bragging to himself of how rich he is for tricking people.

"May we have a word with you Mr. Grin?" Kazuya said as he glared at the receptionist.

"Mr. Grin?" Paul wondered.

"He likes to grin" Kazuya said.

"That IS my name" the receptionist said.

Kazuya sweat dropped anime-style.

"Anyway, we have some business to take care of… That's beating you up!" Kazuya yelled as he and the gang beat him up into a pulp.

The man was left unconscious.

The gang took all of their baggage

"That took care of everything" Lee said.

"If he's the one who called us…then why are the dolls moving?" Paul asked.

"Darn it Paul you're right" Kazuya said as they heard an evil laugh beside them.

"Killer dolls!" Lee yelled and went outside.

All of them ran away.

"That took care of them Tiff, let's watch a movie in Room 302" Chucky said as he and Tiffany went upstairs.

Inside the room,

"Chucky, this tape is blank" Tiffany said pointing to the first tape she saw in the floor.

"Let's watch it" Chucky said as both of them watched it.

The tape played, it's not the same tape Kazuya and the others watched.

"I don't understand a d thing" Chucky complained. The phone rang all of a sudden. Tiffany answered the phone.

"Seven days" the voice said with a few static.

"That's just the receptionist Tiff" Chucky said.

"No, he's unconscious" Tiffany said.

"F you…" Chucky said calmly but nervously.

The gang reached the train station

"We still haven't slept yet" Paul complained.

"We'll sleep at the train" Kazuya said as he looked at Heihachi.

"Are you going with us father?" Lee asked.

"Where are you going anyway?" Heihachi asked.

"Berlin" Marshall said.

"Fine" Heihachi said.

They waited for 2 hours. Kazuya looked at his watched and gave a pissed-off face.

"GREAT we missed the train" Kazuya said angrily.

Everyone sighed.

"But why?" Paul said.

"While we were beating up the receptionist guy, the train just left!" Kazuya said angrily

"I guess we're just going to have to stop a car or something" Lee said as the gang followed him. Minutes of walking, they reached a road.

"Great, there's a road, how can we stop a car?" Marshall said.

" I know, Lee, Show your legs!" Kazuya teased

"Ha-ha good idea" Lee said irritated

" Anything else? Come on! we need to catch their attention" Marshall said

"We need to show them something…How about….Father's thong!" Lee said as he grabbed the thong from Kazuya's backpack.

"So there's my thong…KAZUYA!" Heihachi said angrily.

"Hehe, if it wasn't for this thong, you wouldn't be here" Kazuya said.

Heihachi stood expressionless.

"I just felt like I want a vacation in Europe" Heihachi said

"Too bad I had to go to London until I get to Amsterdam" Heihachi added.

"Gross, that thong really have some strong connections to you" Kazuya said as he laughed.

"Whatever… LEE WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING RIGHT THERE?" Heihachi yelled as he saw Lee waving the gigantic thong in the air.

A truck stopped.

The man looked at them and he spoke in a German language.

"Good idea Lee..." Kazuya said calmly

"I speak German" Paul said as he spoke to the driver.

"Do you think he knows what he's talking about?" Lee whispered to Marshall

"I have no idea…" Marshall replied.

"Guys, he's going to Berlin" Paul said as he gestured the gang to ride at the back of the truck.

"Are you sure he said he's going to Berlin?" Kazuya was feeling uneasy already.

"Yeah" Paul said.

"**Are they really going to Berlin? Did Paul translate it right? Will Heihachi bear the trip with Kazuya? Will Kazuya ridicule Heihachi on the way? I'll work on that chapter sooner".**

**Me**: Success! Chapter 5 done! Reviewsreviewsreviews How was it?

**Chucky**: Who's the b with a long hair that came out from the TV?

**Tiffany:** Are you hitting on her! I hate you!

**Paul:** I can speak German?

**Kazuya:** And I always thought you're an airhead

**Heihachi:** Dear sweet thong of mine, I have finally found you

Everyone looked at Heihachi with disgust

**Lee:** Why do I even bother touching that thong? Gross…

**Nina:** I hate talking dolls

**Anna:** Why are they scary? I'm not scared when I see Jack-2

**Mr. Grin:** I dubbed Samara pretty good. He-he

**Samara:** I speak better than you copycat!

**Keanu Reeves:** Watch the movie 'Constantine'!

**German Guy:** ….?

**Me:** I don't think they even heard me asked (Coughs) Anyway, Hope you like it! Adios…


	6. Kazuya's Comments

**Disclaimer: Okay, I don't own Tekken, Namco does.** **The last chapter was kind of crazy. Since I got mental blocked (Can't think of any ideas)** **I'll move the next chapter to chapter 7. This chapter is just my sub.( I swear I'll update soon). I'll giveKazuya his chance.Hope you like it (",). **

**Me**: Chapter 5 is done! Anyway, since Kazuya is complaining the whole day. I'll give him a chance to speak of what he thinks while I plan for the next fic.

**Kazuya**: can I start now?

**Me**: Sure, go ahead.

Kazuya gave up a small grin.

"To begin with, I never asked Jun about her gender and I have no idea why I didn't, that's one of the reasons why I hate that Lei Wulong too.

Now I ended up STRAINING myself here with a bunch of weirdoes just to see her since this psychopath, trouble-loving hyperactive author here made the trip worst.

She made that pilot sick which I ended up using an international airport instead.

About Marshall's party, I hate it! Lee got himself heavily drunk and he had us dragging him in the streets. I could at least leave him if only he won't spill the beans about that Jun incident. I liked the way I stole Heihachi's thong so he could follow us, he did, didn't he?

About Lee, he isn't really gay, I just loved teasing him around and it's because of the Fiona thing especially the silver hair. Remember him in the plane?

He's singing "The Reason" by Hoobastank. Believe me he sings like he's dehydrated. That stewardess helped a lot, a good excuse to help her plumb. By the way, that song about Lee sold millions of records, I bought one myself (hehe).

About England, Lee and Paul pretend they're from a fan club of the hooligan's team.

Anyway, that hit hurt a lot you know, that hooligan didn't know his own strength.

That dream I usually have is the best thing I could ever had (hehe) but I don't expect anybody to think dirty about that, I'm just too eager to see Jun but the problem is, I always end up being woke up by someone else's voice!

Too bad someone's always there to ruin it.

The plane incident is what I'm talking about, the way Jun suddenly yelled 'I'm not a plumber' in Lee's voice. The train incident is the worst! That Middle-aged perverted fag kept us awake and I have no idea why our AUTHOR here had to add him up to ruin my dream! It was so irritating. Remember Mona Lisa?

The theory that Lee introduced is a mystery to some people. Its true some people think Da Vinci painted Mona Lisa because he's gay but it's still not proven and I have to thank this author of mine for giving me the idea to say 'MONA LEE SA' in my sentence.

That's the worst day for Lee and the happiest day for me. About Mokujin, he mimics moves but Marshall didn't like it and ended up getting his wooden b's kicked.

Poor thing (hehe).

The nudist beach isn't that bad but we caught the all-guys-day instead.

Heihachi made the same mistake of going in there as well.

About the discovery channel thing, Marshall is completely bored.

Since Lee is the object of jokes around here, he made up an animal called The Lee and Lee has no freakin' idea it was him.

Then here we are at the worst place for me, Amsterdam.

Paul embarrassed me in front of many people and I ate some brownies that have no drugs in it. Nina and Anna ate a bad batch. (Those kept them on high for about 30 minutes, never eat hash brownies).

About Marshall in the cell phone shop, we acted like detectives back there, for all places why in the back door? What an idiot.

That Amsterdam hotel did gave me a trip to violence land. After that not-so-scary prank the receptionist planned made me pale. We acted as detectives there again...

Hehe, I solved it again, those guys are such numbskulls they can't tell the difference unless I told them

That off lotion was even crazier.

My father threw me because he wanted his heir as vicious as him not by a mosquito bite he would die not scratching it.Jaganshing(the author) is insane.

By the way, Constantine is two thumbs up! I like it.

I'm I glad I spoiled it for Heihachi

The Child's Play dolls, this author just added them for fun (again).

Anyway, we got our revenge, those stupid dolls watched the cursed videotape and I could laugh hysterically for now.

That German driver kept me worried, I have no idea how Paul learned to speak German but I guess I'll have myself a punching bag in case he translated wrong.

Heihachi accepted to join our trip but will he survive my criticism? Hehe, not a chance! Well… I guess I made this too long, better end it now. HEY! I'M DONE!

Me: Okay, okay. You don't have to yell you know… I'M BESIDE YOU THE WHOLE TIME! Anyway, I finally had an idea for my next fic.THANKS KAZZY-KUN!(hugs Kazuya tightly)

Kazuya: (Gets Strangled) Okay! Okay! LET GO!

Me: See ya!

Kazuya: Whatever...

Lee: Why am I not in this fic?

Kazuya: this is not a fic, it's my comment

Lee: oh...

Me: Hope you like it

Kazuya: You better be


	7. History,The awful truth, The fart bomb, ...

**Disclaimer: I don't own Tekken, Namco does (for the 7th time). Finally I'm back with some ideas, thanks to Kazzy here. He seems to have calmed down a bit. Thank you for your reviews! Enjoy.**

The gang sat at the back of the truck.

"Paul… Are you sure you can REALLY speak German" Kazuya said annoyed.

"Yeah, I used to study German, I even had a German pen pal named Adolf, I ask his help to translate my homework" Paul said,

everyone looked at him surprised.

"No, seriously Paul" Marshall asked.

"Yeah, I do" Paul said.

"What's his last name?" Nina asked.

"Hitler" Paul said straight.

"Paul, tell me you bumped your head in Amsterdam after getting yourself on high" Kazuya said calmly.

"No. What's wrong with you people!" Paul asked angrily.

"Adolf Hitler is a German political and military leader and one of the 20th century's most powerful dictators, He even launched World War II in 1939, also, a Jew hater" Marshall said.

Everyone looked at Marshall.

"There you go, you know about Germany too yet I'm surprised you can't speak the language" Kazuya said.

"There goes my Encarta" Anna said sadly.

"Who invited a walking encyclopedia here?" Lee asked.

"Hey, I'm just giving you guys some ideas" Marshall answered back.

"Maybe it's just coincidence" Paul said.

"And I have a pen pal named Benito Mussolini from Turkey" Anna said as she chuckled.

"Benito Mussolini, he became allies with Hitler, he introduced…" before Marshall could finish,

Paul nudged him

"I'm not kidding!" Paul said.

"Whatever Paul" Nina said. "Someone once told me that Hitler was injected with female hormones, was that true?" Lee said all of a sudden.

"There you go again with your gay facts, man you're annoying me" Kazuya said as he hit Lee in the head.

"If that IS true, I might as well call you MussoLEEni instead.

What do you know…Hitler and MussoLEEni together" Kazuya said giving a heavy emphasis on the word LEE.

Everyone laughed except Lee.

"Admit it Chaolan, First the Mona LEE SA then MussoLEEni, I never expect you to be a faggot detector towards history, you're evil too you know, an evil gay" Anna said.

"Hey stop the Lee talk and tell me what's going on here" Heihachi said.

"Oh I apologize, I forgot you were there" Kazuya said teasingly then gave up an evil chuckle.

"Hrmph! Maybe you want another trip from the cliff again" Heihachi said threatening the not-so threatened Kazuya.

"It wasn't even your idea. You owe that mosquito a lot." Kazuya said.

Heihachi was holding back his anger.

"There goes the father-son rivalry….To think that the sibling-rivalry could have been much interesting" Paul said.

"I told you to leave the old man behind" Lee said.

"Since when did you ever said that? You aren't even saying things about that since the trip began" Kazuya said.

"Then pretend the I-told-you part is not included in my sentence" Lee said

"Can't. You can't change the past" Kazuya replied,

Lee growled and did the tongue again at Kazuya.

"Still haven't changed…" Heihachi said,

"I'm surprised that you care about our behavior" Kazuya said as Heihachi gritted his teeth.

"I'm a father! What do you expect?" Heihachi said angrily

"Glue this to your brain old fart, does 'I-threw-my-own-and-not-adopted-son-off-a-cliff' fatherly for you?" Kazuya asked.

"That part I can't forget" Marshall said as he sobbed

"You're mean baldy!" Anna yelled.

"Blame the mosquito, darn it!" Heihachi yelled.

"You think I can still find the same mosquito that bit you? Can I throw a living mosquito off a cliff, HUH!" Kazuya replied harshly.

"Cut its wings!" Heihachi yelled.

"I CAN'T BECAUSE ITS WINGS ARE TOO SMALL! I CAN'T EVEN CATCH ONE MYSELF!" Kazuya yelled back.

"This moment is unforgettable" Marshall said as he gets them on cam.

"AND WHY DID YOU ADOPT A FAG IN THE FIRST PLACE?" Kazuya yelled.

"WHY DID YOU RAISE ME AS A FAG, FATHER? Now Kazuya won't leave me alone" Lee asked.

Kazuya looked at Lee

"you aren't raised as a faggot, you ARE a faggot" Kazuya said as he faced Heihachi.

"I ADOPTED LEE BECAUSE I THOUGHT YOU DIED IN THAT CLIFF!" Heihachi yelled.

"YOU'RE IDIOT ENOUGH TO NOTICE THAT LEE IS GAY!" Kazuya replied.

They fought for 30 minutes about the cliff and adopting Lee thing.

"And father, May I ask you one question I've been dying to ask ever since I was born" Kazuya returned to his normal state as he changed the topic.

"What?" Heihachi asked. He returned to his normal state too.

"Why are you bald and ugly?" Kazuya asked.

"I have a question too father, why do you wear that thong?" Lee added.

"Me too, what was your hair like when you were young?" Nina added.

"Me three, why do you sound like a walrus?" Anna added.

"I have a question as well, why didn't you abandon Kuma instead?" Paul added.

Everyone looked at Marshall except Heihachi who had been frowning at one edge.

"Me too? Okay, what happened to you in the Nudist beach?" Marshall asked.

Heihachi calmed himself down and looked at them "First of all, Kazuya blame your grandfather! He's a monster…" Heihachi said

"You evil scumbag! At least Grandpa is even nicer than you are!" Kazuya yelled.

"At least my beard is normal than he has!" Heihachi said irritated.

"Whatever, Anyway, I wear that thong because THAT thong would lead me to victory on the 4th tournament, that's according to my fortune teller" Heihachi said.

"4th tournament? Father you're exploring lie-lie world again" Lee said.

"Lie-lei world? Lee you're so lame, Fiona was right about that lame act too" Paul said.

"You COULD say fantasy world…" Anna said.

"Let me finish so you would shut up!" Heihachi yelled.

Everyone became silent and listened to Heihachi with interest.

"My hair is the same as Kazuya's!" Heihachi yelled,

"Then how come a huge bald spot rests in between your two pointy ones?" Nina asked.

"I woke up and it's gone! Okay!" Heihachi replied harshly. Everyone looked at Kazuya.

"Blame that no-good son of mine!" Heihachi yelled. "Good job Kazuya!" Paul said

"Nice bald spot you made there" Anna said as she winked at him

"um…Anna, Berlin. Remember?" Kazuya said calmly.

"Aw…. I KNOW THAT!" Anna was disappointed.

"You can't help it if you're a slut" Nina said

"Why you!" Anna yelled as she rushed for Nina's neck. Before Anna could strangle Nina, Heihachi stopped them.

"About Anna's question, I DON'T SOUND LIKE A WALRUS! I HAVE A DEEP VOICE YOU KNOW!" Heihachi yelled.

" About Kuma, I love bears" Heihachi said

" So do I" Lee said

" Nobody asked..." Kazuya said

Everyone just nodded lazily.

"About the nudist beach, I saw many tourists there. Only guys are there but it's so peaceful in there…"

Heihachi told the story for 20 minutes, everyone fell asleep listening to him.

"You dare sleep at my story…" Heihachi said as he wince and gave up a fart blaster.

"Gross!" Everyone said as they woke up covering their nose.

"Ho-ho, Beans, I don't know how to thank you" Heihachi said.

"In case that could kill the driver, let me know…." Marshall said.

The ride suddenly becomes bumpy.

Everyone panicked except Lee who is still sitting in a corner.

Paul bumped into Nina, Heihachi fell over Kazuya, Marshall and Anna crouched on one corner and Lee did nothing but sit.

The ride suddenly returned to normal

"I thought…it's an earthquake" Marshall said

"Idiot, we're in a truck remember" Kazuya said, they're all lying in their backs except Lee.

"Is everybody all right?" Paul asked. Everyone nodded except Lee.

"Glad that's over…. What's Lee doing?" Kazuya said as he pushed Heihachi off him and dusted off his suit. Heihachi held his head and winced with pain.

"GET OFF ME PHOENIX!" Nina yelled as she pushed Paul beside her.

"Yes!" Marshall yelled.

"What now Einstein?" Paul asked.

"I got everything including the truck panic in cam!" Marshall yelled happily.

Lee laughed evilly all of a sudden

"Anyway, what's up with Lee" Anna asked. "Let's check him out" Paul said as everyone followed him.

"Ha-ha-ha, truth or consequence?" Lee asked.

He was holding a scissor and a piece of paper with a one-legged cockroach glued in it.

The cockroach kept moving.

"Truth? Fine you deserve it. Did you eat my Maltese?" Lee said angrily.

The cockroach kept moving.

"No? okay" Lee said as he cut off the cockroach's leg then he laughed evilly.

"He's gone insane…" Paul said.

"I guess I hit him too hard…" Kazuya said.

Nina and Anna looked at him with a grossed face

"Poor Cockie…" Marshall said as he used his cam on them.

"Cockie? Man you're an unexplained retard" Kazuya said. Lee looked behind him and was surprised to see everyone looking at him

"AHHHHHH! Man, I hate it when you guys do that!" Lee yelled.

"Torturing an insect when bored, eh?" Heihachi said.

"That's what I'm talking about Kazuya" Heihachi said looking at Kazuya.

"I'd rather torture you than torture a mosquito" Kazuya said calmly.

"You…" Before Heihachi could finish Lee threw the no-legged cockroach at them.

Everyone screamed with fright.

The truck suddenly bumped into something then it stopped.

"Are we there yet?" Marshall asked.

The gang went out of the truck and ended up seeing the man unconscious in the driver's seat.

The truck bumped into a post.

Paul walked to the man and spoke German.

"There he goes again…" Lee said.

" Guys, he said he'll be fine, he just needed a rest because of that Fart bomb awhile ago, Anyway, he wants us to know, 'Enjoy Bratislava'" Paul said.

"Bratislava… Way to go Hei fart chi!" Kazuya said irritated.

"If you guys haven't been sleeping I wouldn't have farted you know!" Heihachi yelled.

"It wasn't our fault you got as all bored!" Kazuya replied.

"Don't worry, we could stay in a hotel to let this guy rest" Paul said.

"Better find a prank-free hotel" Kazuya said irritated. "I'd rather sleep out here" Lee said.

"Lee, look before you leap" Marshall said.

Lee looked around him.

The place looked like a war just occurred.

"Okay, I'll go" Lee said. Everyone followed.

'Jun, there's a few more crazy hours to waste. Wait for me' Kazuya thought.

"**I guess Paul translated right after all. Was Kazuya's predictions true or will they experience another crazy day? How will they handle a day in Bratislava? I'll update very soon (",).**

**Me**: Chapter 7 finally! How are you guys by the way?

**Kazuya**: That fight was entertaining. I enjoyed killing Heihachi by words, Hehehe

**Lee:** he-he I'll find another cockroach and cut off its legs and….

Everyone looks at him

**Lee**: What!

**Heihachi**: Nobody messes with my thong! Everything I've said is true!

Marshall: …and CUT! Brilliant!

**Paul**: Booya! I spoke German successfully!

**Anna**: I'll kick your ass next time, Nina!

**Nina:** whatever…

**German Guy**: XX….

**Cockie**: BEWARE….BEWARe…BEWAre…BEWare…BEware…Beware…beware…

**Me**: Shutup you no-legged zombie roach! I guess they have fun…. Hope you like it (",) Adios.


	8. Bratislava,Fan Cannibals,Truth or Dare

**Disclaimer: I don't own Tekken and some of the movies here. The last fic seems to stick in history, no offense to Hitler, Mona Lisa and Mussolini, Blame Lee (he-he). Anyway, I think I'm getting a hang of making this fic crazier than I ever expected. Thanks for the reviews. Enjoy!**

Walking in the depths of Bratislava, They see people crowding on the streets.

Some are taking a bath on the sides, some are eating like cannibals and some are just bored doing nothing.

"Still want to sleep here Lee?" Anna asked.

"Not a chance!" Lee prompted.

"I'd rather stay in a prank hotel than hang out with these people" Paul said.

"Let's kill the fart bomb" Kazuya said looking at Heihachi.

Heihachi just laughed hysterically.

"Do that again and we won't hesitate strangling you to death" Nina said as she glared at Heihachi.

"I think we're becoming good friends now Nina" Kazuya said calmly, Nina just shrugged.

"Touché Mishima, touché" Nina added.

Heihachi did nothing but laugh.

"Gee Kazuya, your father has found a place for him" Paul said

"this place might be a good spot for his grave" Kazuya mumbled silently.

"Were you saying something?" Lee asked.

"Go mind your own business somewhere else!" Kazuya replied harshly.

"Is that what he does if he's bored?" Marshall asked as he used his cam on Heihachi.

"Since if he does that all the time to ease his boredom, I won't hesitate getting him on cam and watch him go crazy off-guarded" Marshall added.

"You're speaking my language Law" Kazuya said.

"And besides, either bored or not, he's crazy. He has a world of his own." Kazuya said calmly.

Heihachi just kept laughing.

"Father! You're embarrassing us" Lee yelled irritated.

"You can't blame me!" Heihachi said as he continued laughing while pointing at a T.V. in the corner.

"The man on T.V. has a crazy hairstyle" Heihachi said as he laughed hysterically.

The gang watched and was startled except for Anna and Nina.

"This film is freakin' familiar" Paul said.

"I remember you saying 'he pretends he's in a Ferris wheel' in the hotel" Lee said.

The film ended.

"That's it?" Heihachi complained.

The guys except Anna and Nina laughed hysterically.

"You're so shameless laughing at yourself" Paul said as he continued to laugh.

"What do you mean?" Heihachi was clueless.

"Picture this, was the title 'Heihachi's Funniest Videos' rang any bells?" Marshall said as he laughed.

Heihachi just stood there expressionless while seeing everyone laughed at him

"Crazy hairstyle the man has, eh?" Kazuya said as he laughed

"This is one of the reasons why I love teasing the old fart, he can't recognized his own face" Kazuya mumbled to himself.

"Father laughed at himself" Lee said as he laughed.

Heihachi just growled angrily.

"Just find a hotel!" Heihachi yelled.

"Look! It's the star of 'Heihachi's funniest videos'!" a man said as he ran to Heihachi with some other people.

Heihachi ran away

"I told you to leave father…" Lee said calmly as he ran too.

"It's not my fault he had rabid fan cannibals" Kazuya replied.

"Cannibals you were saying?" Paul wondered.

"There's a description awhile ago about people eating like cannibals, I'm quite sure you didn't see that coming" Anna said.

"Fan cannibals? Never heard of those" Nina said.

Everyone ran away until they reached a hotel.

They quickly entered.

"That was close" Marshall said.

"Was I that famous?" Heihachi said.

"Yeah, you're famous all right, for idiots…" Kazuya teased.

"Picture this, 'Heihachi Mishima, Japan's number 1 bald comedienne'" Paul said giving Heihachi a nonsense title.

"I'll support that if it just says 'Japan's bald comedienne'" Marshall said.

"Just say 'bald comedienne'" Anna said.

"Forget you!" Heihachi yelled.

"Where's the fag?" Kazuya said glancing at every side.

A minute later, Lee fell in the fireplace.

"YOU LEFT ME!" Lee yelled.

"Faggots will only slow me down" Kazuya said calmly.

Lee growled angrily as he went to them.

"Anyway, let's get a room" Paul said as he went to the reception.

After giving them a key, they all went to the room they're assigned to.

"So what do we do now? We can't just wait here doing nothing" Anna said.

"I know, let's play 'TRUTH OR DARE'!" Marshall insisted.

"I agree just to do something" Paul said.

"Let's make an agreement, everyone must do their dares whether they like it or not" Lee said

"No comment" Kazuya, Heihachi and Nina chorused.

"Great" Marshall said as he grabbed a bottle from his backpack.

He spins it and landed on Kazuya.

"You got to be kidding me…" Kazuya said in a hushed irritated voice.

"Deal with it, the bottle chose you" Marshall said.

Kazuya looked away irritated.

"Truth or dare" Marshall asked as a Dracula laugh sound effect was heard.

"Are you a vantreliquist?" Kazuya asked

"What's with the laugh" Paul asked.

"Nothing, just to spice up this game and I'm not a vantreliquist" Marshall said.

Paul sweat dropped anime-style

"Dare" Kazuya said.

"I dare you to watch Teletubbies and sing the opening song they sing" Marshall said.

"Teletubbies? Aren't those the little aliens with different colors? The one with a baby sun as well?" Paul asked

"Yeah" Marshall replied.

"Man, the horror" Paul said calmly.

"Paul, that movie is specially made for children, not for some adults you know!" Anna said.

"It would be better if you see those freaky aliens do their film like the South Park series" Paul said.

"What's your problem anyway?" Lee asked.

"Stupidity never wears off in that film" Paul said

"You mean you watch Teletubbies!" Marshall asked surprised

"No, I'm just reading the CD case" Paul said, everyone sweat dropped.

"In that case…No way, anything but that!" Kazuya yelled angrily.

"It's a dare" Marshall said.

"No way" Kazuya replied.

"Suit yourself, you don't want anyone to find out about that train incident with that crazy perverted Italian freak" Marshall said blackmailing Kazuya.

"Nice try, you think that story would scare me?" Kazuya showed defense.

"Fine, I got it on cam anyway" Marshall said as he waved the camera at Kazuya's face.

"Okay I'll do the freakin' dare!" Kazuya yelled.

"Don't be so mean to the Teletubbies, They ARE cute you know…" Anna said.

"Yeah when they're dead" Kazuya and Paul chorused as they laughed hysterically.

"What are Teletubbies?" Heihachi asked

"Father, you're too old to know that" Lee said as he laughed.

"On with the dare you guys!" Marshall said as he played the CD to the DVD player.

"Blackmailer" Kazuya mumbled, Marshall just laughed. The opening plays, it's a sing-a-long feature.

"Stinky Winky" Kazuya sang changing the lyrics.

"HEY! Sing it properly!" Marshall yelled.

He rewinds the CD from the start.

"Now you have to start over again!" Marshall yelled. Kazuya sighed.

"Okay, here goes" Marshall said as he played the CD back.

"Stinky Winky" Kazuya changed the lyrics again.

"Knock it off! I'm getting tired rewinding it" Marshall yelled.

Everyone laughed hysterically.

'This is getting good' Kazuya thought.

The song played again.

"Mona LEE sa, Nina, Anna, Paul. Heihachi, the bald and ugly, wears a thong" Kazuya completely changed the lyrics. (Teletubbies opening tune, He-he).

"What's with our names, Kazuya?" Paul asked.

"Nothing, just to fit it in my lyrics" Kazuya said.

Everyone laughed except Marshall.

"I never thought this would become entertaining" Nina said.

"Anyway, why wasn't Marshall in the lyrics?" Lee asked.

"He's the second voice" Kazuya said.

"Let's see your score…" Marshall said lazily.

Kazuya's score is 100.

Everyone's jaw dropped.

"How is it possible?" Marshall wondered.

"I guess I'm good" Kazuya said calmly. Everyone laughed.

"This is crazy, anyway, it's your turn to spin" Marshall said as he kept his CD.

Kazuya spins

'Father, father, father' Kazuya thought.

The bottle landed on Lee.

'Darn it, what a loss, anyway, Lee deserves my revenge' Kazuya thought

"Truth or dare" Kazuya asked. "Dare" said Lee,

"I dare you to go to Rafiki's house (Lion King) and draw some graffiti in his branch and sign 'You'll pay' on it.

I'm getting my revenge on that freaky baboon" Kazuya said irritated.

"Why?" Lee asked.

"It has something to do during our camping in Africa" Kazuya said.

_Flashback…little Kazuya was sitting in a rock _

_"Darn it, I'm lost! Stupid father" Kazuya said as he gritted his teeth. A baboon went to him. _

_"Maybe I could help you" The baboon said. Kazuya was startled. _

_"AH! WHO ARE YOU?" Kazuya asked. _

_"The question is 'Where are you?' the baboon said. _

_"Lost, Happy now? And why am I talking to a baboon? Are you a mirage/" Kazuya said irritated. _

_"No not actually but to be able to return, you must 'Trace your Steps'" The baboon said. _

_"Trace my steps? What's that suppose to mean?" Kazuya asked confused. _

_"You follow Rafiki's words, you'll see" the baboon said as he left. _

_"Okay…I'll trace my footprints" Kazuya said looking for his footprints 'Darn it, they're gone!' Kazuya thought._

_"Kazuya, lunch is ready" Little Lee said._

_"Stop bothering me, I'm tracing my steps" Kazuya said. _

_Little Lee laughed. _

_"The camp is just behind this tree" Lee said as he chuckled. _

_Kazuya growled. _

_"YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS EVIL BABOON!" Kazuya yelled. End of flashback._

Everyone was holding back their laughter.

"So that's why you're tracing your steps" Lee said.

Heihachi laughed hysterically.

"Anyway, that's crazy" Lee said.

"I have two choices of dares. It's either strip or draw graffiti" Kazuya said.

"I'd like to see Lee become a stripper" Marshall said.

"Fine a dare is a dare!" Lee yelled.

"Who's Rafiki?" Anna asked.

"A Baboon who lives on a big tree beside a pride rock in Africa" Kazuya said.

"Africa? You mean I need to go to Africa!" Lee asked.

"What do you expect? He lives next door? Don't worry our author here placed a teleport machine in this room" Kazuya said.

"Kazuya, isn't it too much? It's not his fault you take things literally" Lee said.

"Shut up or I'll change my dare!" Kazuya said. Lee just nodded and went to the teleport machine.

"I'll go with him" Marshall said as he followed Lee.

"Since when did Rafiki exist?" Paul asked

"The day 'The Lion King' was released" Kazuya said.

Paul sweat dropped.

"Man, maybe you hit your head in the truck" Paul said,

"Hey, FANFICTION, get it?" Kazuya said.

"I get Fiction but this is reality!" Paul said. "Whatever…" Kazuya said.

In Africa…

"Where is the tree Kazuya's talking about?" Lee asked Marshall who seems to be enjoying Africa.

"There are lots of trees here" Marshall said.

Lee looked around until he saw a gigantic grotesque-like tree (no offense, it looked grotesque).

"That must be it" Lee said as he and Marshall climbed in it.

"No one's here" Marshall said. Lee looked at the drawings, there's a lion cub drawn in it.

"Man, now I've seen everything" Marshall said as he got it on cam.

Lee drew a stick-like figure beside the cub and signed

'You'll pay, a Mishima is watching you' Lee wrote.

Just then, Rafiki entered.

"Who are you? Who told you to draw on Rafiki's house?" Rafiki yelled.

"Now I believe that humans came also from monkeys…RUN! I BELIEVE YOU CHARLES DARWIN!" Lee yelled as he ran away.

"It's a dare" Marshall said as he ran with Lee.

"You get back here!" Rafiki yelled. Marshall's camera is still on while dangling in his neck.

Their running scene is caught on cam (like Blair Witch Project).

They reached a river. As they saw their reflection, Marshall and Lee saw their father's faces (like in Lion King where Simba saw Mufasa's face in the pond)

"That's not my reflection!" Lee and Marshall yelled as they ran away to the teleport machine.

In the hotel, Kazuya and the others are playing cards. Lee and Marshall arrived.

"That….was weird…First there was a grotesque tree then a scary baboon then a pond that shows you a different reflection" Lee said.

Marshall noticed his camera was on. "Oh, I forgot to turn it off" Marshall said as he saved the clip and gave the cam to Kazuya.

"Watch it" Marshall said.

Everyone gathered around Kazuya to watch the film.

"I could've sworn I saw my father's reflection in that pond" Marshall said.

"But who did I saw, I never knew the man I saw in the pond, It wasn't Heihachi either" Lee wondered.

Lee suddenly received a hard blow in his head.

"WHAT DID I DO NOW!" Lee asked

"I only told you to write 'You'll Pay'!" Kazuya yelled.

"Hey, Father wants to cut that tree during our camping you know" Lee said. Everyone laughed hysterically.

"Is it me or that monkey talks!" Paul said as he laughed.

"Is this a special effect or you saw the Blair witch project's director?" Nina said.

"Who's reflection did you saw, Lee?" Kazuya asked.

Everyone looked at Heihachi.

"It doesn't look like Heihachi" Anna said. "It looks like the Italian guy inside the train" Marshall said.

"It means you're not my real father? NO!" Lee yelled.

"Shut up, everyone knows you're adopted" Kazuya said.

"Oh, anyway, my turn to spin" Lee said as he returned to his normal state.

Lee spins and lands on Anna.

"Hey, let's check if the guy is all right now" Anna said as she stood up.

"You're not going anywhere…The game has just begun…." Lee said as he laughed evilly.

**"What will happen next? How long will they be playing? I'll update soon**

**Me**: That was okay

**Kazuya**: throw that Teletubbies CD

**Lee**: NO!

**Lee:** Anyway, who's the man I saw?

**Paul:** Fan Cannibals?

**Nina:** you don't see that everyday…

**Anna**: Lee must be possessed

**Heihachi**: I'm so famous. Everybody want an autograph?

**Everyone:** YUCK!

**Marshall**: I'm better than you Spielberg!

**S. Spielberg**: In your dreams

**Rafiki**: Mishima? What's a Mishima?

**Me**: Maybe something's happening here that I should become aware of. See you soon. Adios


	9. Still stranded, What a life

**Disclaimer: I don't own Tekken so don't sue me. It's been a long time since I've been here (A very, very long time). Sorry about that…And I miss being with these guys and you guys who love reading this fic. Thanks for the reviews, he-he, Yup, Eurotrip's the best. Anyway, hope you like this fic. Enjoy!**

Anna sat down upon seeing everyone glare at her.

"Thanks a lot, FART BOMB" she said in her calmest tune.

Heihachi grunted

"What did I do now!" he said

"Led us to this specter of doom, what else?" Kazuya said irritated.

"He-he, now let's see, what could Anna's dare be?" Lee said browsing his mind.

"Face it, faggots have no known dares" Kazuya interrupted

"Shut it Kazuya!" Lee answered back.

"Shut what?" Kazuya said as he chuckled inside him.

"Shouldn't it suppose to be 'Shut up'?" Marshall said raising his eyebrows

"Kids, so immature" Heihachi murmured

"I know! Anna I dare you to seduce my father, Heihachi" Lee said

"Who says he's your father?" Kazuya interrupted,

Lee just looked at him

"Yeah, Heihachi's not your father" Paul added.

In a blink of an eye Anna ran to the door

"LEMME OUTTA HERE!" she yelled but Lee blocked the door.

"Very funny, you thought I'll be seduced by a childish exuberant female?" Heihachi said as he stood up pounding his chest.

"This old man, he's annoyed, he played Knick-knack on the floor….blah, blah, blah" Paul sung lazily.

Marshall was watching the video he took in Africa and was laughing hysterically.

Just then an old woman entered carrying pillows

"Hotel service" she said lazily.

Heihachi's eyeballs popped.

"That's….what I'm talking about" he said.

Flowers started to grow around him and chirping birds can be heard from a distance.

Kazuya looked at him with indifference then he looked at the old woman.

"Now I've seen everything in this dismal world" Kazuya said silently.

The old woman placed the pillows in the bed.

She was about to leave when Heihachi stood beside her.

"I was thinking, maybe we could see each other during your break time. What do you say?" he said as if he's never been married before.

The old woman ignored him then walked away.

As Heihachi sat on the floor everyone started laughing.

"What a loser!" Kazuya said as he laughed hysterically.

"He can't even hook up with old women" Lee said.

"No offense but, yo poppa is so ugly that even blind witches won't date him" Paul said.

"I'm starting to like this broom head much better" Kazuya said calmly.

"A dare is a dare Anna" Lee said.

"What kind of a dare is that anyway?" Anna said almost into tears.

Lee looked at her and a pint of evil rests on his face.

"I'll let you pass this dare in one condition" Lee said in a grin

'I'm outta here" Kazuya said as he left and went outside the balcony.

"I'll do anything!" Anna yelled.

"I want you to be my girlfriend in this whole trip" Lee said.

"Anything but that Chaolan!" Anna yelled on top of her lungs.

"Father…" Lee said calmly.

"OKAY, OKAY I'LL DO YOUR STUPID FAVOR! JUST LET ME PASS ON THIS DARE!" Anna yelled.

"Goodie, okay, now be a good girl and spin the bottle" Lee said as he gave Anna the bottle.

"Now be a good girl and spin the bottle" Anna mimicked in her lousiest tune.

"Father…" Lee called out.

"OKAY I'M SORRY!" Anna yelled.

"You don't have to yell you're burning my ears" Paul complained, he was lying in the bed to ease his boredom.

Anna spins the bottle and lands on Heihachi

'I'm dating a FAGGOT!' she thought

"FATHER" Lee called out again.

"WHAT? You've been calling me several times!" Heihachi yelled angrily.

"Nothing…." Lee said.

'Stupid Chaolan' Anna thought, she was on the verge of thinking when she saw Nina smirking at her.

"What are YOU looking at? Hoping Kazuya would do the same?" she yelled.

"Nothing in particular…So how's your BOYFRIEND?" Nina teased

"I TOLD YOU NINA, HE'S…" Nina was cut-off when she heard Lee coughed.

"My boyfriend" Anna said in a whisper.

Nina laughed at her. Anna shrugged and walked to the restroom.

She shut the door at full force.

'WHAT ABOUT HEIHACHI'S DARE?" Marshall yelled.

An indistinct voice was heard

"WHAT?" Marshall yelled.

"I DARE HIM TO ASK THE OLD LADY OUT!" Anna indistinctly yelled.

"Ooooh…nice dare" Marshall said as he rubbed both of his palms.

"How come almost everyone seems to be yelling this day…" Paul wondered.

"What now, Frankenstein?" Lee asked.

"Heihachi, she dares you to ask the old lady out" Marshall said.

"WHAT? Okay" He gladly accepted.

Heihachi stood up and went outside.

"So, you think father will?" Lee was puzzled.

"Trust me, I'll keep an eye out for you" Marshall said as he silently followed Heihachi with his cam.

"What a hobby" Lee murmured.

Kazuya was sitting in the balcony holding the photo of Jun.

He grabbed a marker from his pocket and scribbled something on Wulong's face.

'Piece of cake eh? Well taking Jun from me won't be a piece of cake' Kazuya thought.

His vision went to the streets of Bratislava

'Call me crazy but this place looks like the aftermath of Armageddon' he thought.

His eyes finally went to Jun.

'A FEW more days and I'll be seeing you…a few more days…' he thought.

Kazuya got bored, stood up and went inside but was surprise to see Heihachi gone.

"Where's the fart?" Kazuya asked with eyebrows raised.

"You've been gone for a couple of minutes, it already wore off" Paul said.

'I wasn't talking about your fart, I'm talking about father" Kazuya said trying hard not to laugh.

"Oh" Paul was indeed bored.

"He left to carry out his dare" Lee said.

"What dare?" Kazuya asked.

"Erm…he's supposed to ask the old lady out…" Lee said browsing his mind.

Kazuya sat down with satisfaction

"This is going to be good" he calmly said.

"Very good indeed…" Lee added.

Marshall was hiding behind a plant.

He turned his camera on and focused it on Heihachi.

Heihachi was following the old woman everywhere.

"Like a puppy following his mommy" Marshall said.

Out of the blue he saw Heihachi rolling on the floor screaming

"I like you! I like you! I like you!" Very much like a spoiled child asking for candy.

Marshall was stuck in one corner holding back laughter like crazy.

The he saw Heihachi stomped his foot on the floor

"HRMPH!" he grunted.

"Is this what they call a father? Very much like a son to me…" Marshall said to himself as he sweat dropped.

Heihachi was seen dragging his butt on the floor, like a dog filled with fleas.

The old woman looked at him with indifference.

"Please! I beg of you! I already lost my wife!" Heihachi begged as he knelt in front of the old woman.

"…you poor thing" the woman spoke.

She pulled Heihachi up and helped him walk.

Marshall's eyebrows started twitching like crazy.

"This…is so weird" Marshall said in a sigh.

Heihachi walked with the woman with a huge smile drawn on his face.

He's the happiest man that ever lived.

Back to Kazuya and the gang, they were watching television, two lesbian women were making out.

"Isn't there anything better to do besides wasting our time watching these two lesbians do their job?" Paul complained.

"Nothing to report" Nina said lazily

"Where's your R-rating right there" Lee said as he grinned.

"Somebody please tell me getting stuck in this hotel is all just a big lie" Kazuya said irritated

"Relax bro. you're here to see Jun, remember?" Lee cheered.

"See Jun, yes, stuck with you weirdoes, no" he said as he rolled his eyeballs because of nuisance.

"Don't give up, I didn't give up when that stewardess refused to make out with me, Until now, I'm not giving up until I found that European babe I'm talking about, Giving up is useless" Lee said,

He seems to be in the mood.

Kazuya looked at him expressionless

"Have you been taking drugs Lee?" Kazuya said bored.

"How come every time I do good things I always end up doing the worst" Lee said in a frown.

"You mismatched my topic, you dumb faggot. I meant to say 'it's not like you to tell things like that'! BAKA ONNA!" Kazuya yelled.

Paul was walked beside them and handed them a paper.

"What in the world is this now Phoenix?" Kazuya asked annoyed.

"I made a song parody, a parody about My Chemical Romance's "Helena", though I loved that song yet I love making fun of it as well." He said blissfully.

Kazuya took a glance at the paper.

_Long ago_

_Just when you fart you tried to repeat again_

_We ran so far from you_

_Farting on_

_In front of us you tried to exterminate  
The lives of everyone you know _

And what's the worst to take  
From every fart you make  
And like the air you stained  
I'm suffocating on tonight

What's the worst that I can take  
Things are better if I spray  
Lysol or perfume  
Lysol or perfume

_Came a time  
When in a grand ball caused you to fart again  
We are the victims of your smoke  
And what's the worst to take  
From every fart you make  
And like the air you stained  
Well I've been on the floor all night _

What's the worst that I can take  
Things are better if I spray  
Lysol or perfume  
Lysol or perfume  
Well if you carry on this way  
Things are better if I spray  
Lysol or perfume  
Lysol or perfume

Can you hear me  
Are you near me  
Can we pretend to leave and then  
We'll meet again when both our farts collide

Kazuya gave the paper to Lee, Lee started laughing hysterically.

"Gross man, you really are bored" Kazuya commented.

"Not my fault, I've been SO bored my whole life in this place" Paul said.

"Now I can see why you add 'fart' in your lyrics" Kazuya said bluntly as he remembered what Paul said awhile ago about the absence of fart.

"I'm so good, I'm so…AH!" Paul tripped because of Kazuya's trench coat.

"Another casualty of the seduction of art…" Kazuya said to himself.

"I'm okay…" Paul said as he stood up

"Man, what a life" He added.

"So, what if Jun ignored you like father's situation?" Lee asked.

"Do I have to answer!" Kazuya asked annoyed.

"It's better if you would" Lee replied.

"Lee, are you drunk or something?" Kazuya asked doubtfully.

"No I'm not drunk! I'm BORED!" Lee said.

"So that's how faggots act when they're bored…weird…" Kazuya said in his calmest tune.

"Just answer the question" Lee said calmly.

"Man, you're starting to freak me out" Kazuya said as he stood up and glared at Lee.

"Kazuya, why do you hate me? I'm your only brother" Lee said as he stood up and walked to Kazuya.

"Adopted brother" Kazuya said as he took a step backward

"Not just any adopted brother" Lee said as he tried to reach Kazuya

"Bear in mind you're ADOPTED" Kazuya accentuated the word 'Adopted'.

"Let's try to be good brothers for one straight year" Lee said getting closer to Kazuya

"We won't fight…we share things….we…."

"Okay, what do you want!" Kazuya said as he pushed Lee away from him.

"There's a club out there, I want to go, can I burrow some cash?

" Lee pleaded. "What the heck! Do you have to freak me out! Here!" Kazuya said as he threw some money at Lee.

"You won't go?" Lee asked as he picked up the money

"On second thought, I guess I'll just bite you this day" Kazuya said as he followed Lee.

"I'll go too" Paul insisted

"Me too" Nina stood up.

Anna came out dressed for bed time

"I'll sleep" Anna said as she laid down

"Nah, you're coming with me" Lee said as he pulled Anna

'Why is this happening to me' Anna complained in her thoughts

"The trip is not yet over Anna, neither the game is".

They all went to the club except Marshall who seems to be enjoying spying on Heihachi until now.

I guess the game's not over. They won't stop until the driver wakes up. Sorry 'bout that parody song, I just made that up fun. The title is Hey Lena(Lysol or perfume)by me. The band is My Chemical Romance. How long will that driver sleep? Will the gang bear a long day in Bratislava? Will Kazuya bear another crazy day? Will Heihachi win the love of the old woman? Will Marshall give up following him? Can Anna bear the fact that Lee is her boyfriend? The answer lies on the next chapter…

**Shing**: Finally, another chapter finished! Success!

**Kazuya**: (Strangles Shing) WHY YOU LITTLE PIPSQUEAK! WHY DON'T YOU JUST SKIP ALL THE CRAZY THINGS AND LEAD ME TO JUN

**Shing**: If you kill me, you won't be able to see Jun in this fic! (Escapes from Kazuya's grip) and There won't be a story when I do that!

**Kazuya**: I don't care!

**Shing**: Please excuse Kazzy, he's in depression

**Kazuya**: Am not! Well, actually, 25 yes

**Lee**: Anna dear, could you fetch me my jacket

**Anna:** Anna do this, Anna do that, don't you have hands to do things?

**Nina**: nothing in particular…I haven't done much

**Heihachi**: A toast to my one true love, Ms. Old Woman

**Old woman**: I HAVE A NAME! Don't just call me old woman

**Marshall**: (Laughing like crazy) Heihachi, a baby daddy

**Gerard Way (the vocalist of My Chemical Romance):** All right, who did it? Who made that parody?

**Paul:** Yo poppa? Shouldn't it be yo momma? Man, I really am bored

**Shing**: Gosh, what a crazy day, I guess karma always follows…CIAO!


	10. Absinthe could kill you

**Disclaimer: I don't own Tekken (Do I have to write this all the time?) so please don't sue me…okay? Finally it's our Christmas vacation and I'm so happy to be here again. Sorry about the long updates, Too many projects in school…so little time…Well anyway…I hope you like this one…I'm still recovering from school trauma (just kidding)…Enjoy!**

Lee and the gang entered the club in Bratislava.

Inside, people can be seen flooding the dance floor as Lee and the others, with the exception of Kazuya who's just sitting on one corner pushed their way to the middle.

As for Kazuya, he just spent his time looking at the photo while the others are enjoying themselves.

Anna seems to be escaping Lee's grip,

Paul seems to try his best to flirt with Nina but she just brushes him off.

As for Marshall, he's still spying on Heihachi,

probably because he's starting to think that making fun of the old fart besides Lee is much fun than making fun of Kazuya and the others.

What amused him the most is that Heihachi has no idea.

Lee started screaming along when he heard a bunch of teenagers screaming the word 'Europe'.

Paul, Anna and Nina looked at him with their eyebrows arched.

"What's his problem?" Paul wondered.

A minute later, they finally sat down with Kazuya.

"Let me rate it to you Lee, you're a 100 percent idiot than I could ever imagine" Kazuya said straight-faced.

"I got carried away" Lee said.

"Check it out man" Paul said pointing beside a pillar.

Two teenagers are making out.

"Jamie's hooking up with another girl" one of the teenagers said.

"I couldn't even imagine myself doing that…" Lee said as he pouted.

"Because people will see you as a lesbian instead of a guy" Nina said

"Dream on, faggots hate people who make out" Kazuya said teasingly.

"Shut up!" Lee yelled as he watched the teens with interest.

"So you're in the verge of exploding in your pants?" Paul asked Lee teasingly, he just ignored him.

Suddenly, the two teenagers screamed.

"They're the worst twins ever" one of them said.

"What the heck!" Lee was surprised.

Kazuya's jaw dropped,

Paul's eyeballs popped out,

Anna and Nina were stunned.

A minute later, the teens left.

A green bottle was left on their table.

"They've been drinking this stuff" Paul said as he grabbed the bottle.

"Absinthe" Nina said reading the label.

Lee, on the other hand, had the same bottle as the one they're holding.

"Hey guys, I heard those teens say this thing is illegal in other countries, let's have a sip, shall we?" Lee said.

The gang gathered around him with cups on their hands.

"What about you, dear brother?" Lee asked.

Kazuya shrugged and looked away.

"…whatever…" he said.

Lee poured some on Kazuya's cup then he started drinking his'.

"So, what does it do?" Paul asked.

"I don't know…Do you?" Lee asked a green fairy beside him

"I don't know a damn thing about that stuff" the fairy said.

"I know…It makes faggots talk to one's self" Kazuya mockingly said.

Lee saw a magic wand beside him, he grabbed it and pointed it at Kazuya and started blabbering some spells that only made Kazuya arched an eyebrow.

"Gosh Lee, from what planet was that language from? Kazuya asked.

"Stars I see stars!" Paul yelled as he points at the ceiling.

Anna suddenly hugged Nina.

Nina did the same.

Two sisters joined on a tight embrace.

"Excuse me, but what does this 'thing' do?" Kazuya asked the bartender.

"It makes you hallucinate and stuff" the bartender said that gave Kazuya a more irritated look.

He sat down annoyed.

Then he started drinking on his cup without knowing Lee poured some Absinthe in it.

A minute later, he saw a dancing Heihachi beside their table wearing a tight red spandex.

He looked at Heihachi stupefied then he started laughing hysterically.

Tears were almost dripping from his eyes.

For the first time in history, Kazuya laughed uncontrollably.

(**Jaganshing:** Be aware that he's only seeing an illusion of Heihachi).

Meanwhile, Heihachi went to the club together with the old woman.

Marshall was behind them all the time until he saw Lee on the dance floor screaming his lungs out with the bottle on his hand

"GO BUCKBEAK!" he yelled.

Paul was running around in circles

"Houston! We have a problem" Paul yelled.

Nina and Anna are still on a tight embrace.

Kazuya is pounding the table due to laughter

"Wait till everybody sees you dance around with that wrinkled butt of yours!" he said as he continued to laugh,

Marshall sweat-dropped after seeing them as he quickly focused his camera on them.

"Gosh, the crazier the better…Oh, I love my art" he said to himself. Heihachi noticed the gang and went to them.

"People, meet my…" he was cut-off when Lee went to him

"It's LORD VOLDEMORT!" Lee yelled as he pointed an invisible wand at Heihachi

"Feel the wrath of my spell!" he added.

"Lee, what is this nonsense about!" Heihachi asked angrily.

Lee ran away

"Hermione! Ron! VOLDEMORT'S AFTER ME!" he screamed.

"Hrmph! Too much Harry Potter books…" Heihachi muttered under his nose.

He saw Paul grabbing something

"Phoenix! What's going on here?" he asked.

"It's THE BLACK HOLE! Paul Phoenix of star command Come in star command!" Paul panicked.

Heihachi was getting irritated. He saw Kazuya on one side laughing

"Kazuya, can you tell me what's going on here?" he asked.

"That's it! Everyone would love seeing that big butt of yours, father you're killing me" he said as he continued to laugh.

The old woman looked at Heihachi with disgust

"Your son is a drunkard?" she asked.

"Ah…you see…you don't understand…eh…" Heihachi was speechless.

Marshall suddenly popped up in front of Heihachi

"Smile! This is a live camera footage" he said as he continued capturing everyone on cam.

"They're making a movie, how nice" the old woman said that gave Heihachi a sigh of relief.

"Yeah…my son's role is a homeless drunkard,

the other one's showing a biography of an astronaut,

that one is playing the role of Harry Potter, a wizard,

and those women are doing a drama" Heihachi excused and the woman seems to believe him.

"What talented kids" the old woman praised.

Heihachi just laughed inside of him.

'I'm saved, I'm saved' he thought.

Suddenly, the Absinthe's effect wore off, Paul suddenly collapsed to the floor, Lee fell asleep beside the bar

"I defeated Voldemort…" he said as he finally went on a deep slumber.

Kazuya fell flat-faced on the table.

Nina and Anna screamed after seeing each other but a yawn halted them both.

"The end" Marshall said.

Heihachi noticed the old woman crying.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"What a sad ending…they all died…" she said as she continued to sob.

Heihachi raised an eyebrow

'Man, I'm a good liar…' he thought.

And that's the end of their drunkenness.

**What will happen next? Find out on the next chapter…**

**Jaganshing:** Whoa! Finally, I've finished another chapter!

**Kazuya:** You know what, I got the craziest dream…I saw father dancing like a moron

**Lee: **-- Zzzzz… (Thumb sucking)

**Anna:** I hugged NINA!  
**Nina:** I hugged ANNA!

**Paul: **(talking in his sleep) …the universe is saved…Thanks to Paul Phoenix

**Old woman**: I want a sequel!

**Heihachi**: Of course my dear, we'll see…

**Marshall: A**nd CUT! THE END…

**Jaganshing:** No, the fic hasn't ended yet, Thanks for reading. CIAO!


	11. The Worst Day Ever

**Disclaimer: I don't own Tekken, Okay, Namco does. The previous chapter was kind of crazy (he-he). Anyways, better keep writing…**

"Ouch….my head hurts" Kazuya was the first to get up.

He looked at everyone, they're the only ones left and it's already morning.

"Talk about the craziest dream I've ever had, it kind of reminds me about…THIS TABLE, THE ABSINTHE!" he said to himself.

He stood up and went to check on Lee. Lee was thumb sucking in his sleep.

Kazuya felt the urge to laugh then he kicked Lee straight in the face

"OW! KAZUYA! WHAT'S THE IDEA OF KICKING ME!" he asked angrily.

"What are you, a toddler? YOU DROPPED AN AMOUNT OF ABSINTHE IN MY DRINK! You fag!" he said angrily.

Lee just laughed nervously

"You could've had more, I became Harry Potter in just a few minutes" Lee said.

Kazuya grabbed him by the collar

"I'm going to kill you this time, sissy man!" he said as he grinned.

Lee started screaming like a girl that woke everybody up.

"Lee! Shut up!" Paul said groggily.

"Yeah, you sissy pants!" Anna said

"I thought that's you Anna" Nina teased that sent them punching each other again.

"He started it" he said, pointing at Kazuya.

"Everybody, snap out of it!" Kazuya yelled as he threw Lee on one side.

Marshall was behind him all along.

"Good morning, I see you guys had a wonderful evening" he said.

"Marshall? I thought you're with father?" Lee wondered.

"Last night, yes" Marshall said.

"Where is he then?" Kazuya asked.

"Who knows?" Marshall said.

"Might be behind curtain number one" Paul said as he pulled the curtain behind him.

Everyone shielded their eyes

"MY EYES!" Lee yelled.

"Whatever is in it, I dare not to watch" Marshall said.

"Relax, it's only Heihachi with the old woman sleeping beside him" Paul said,

"Oh gosh, I hit the jackpot this time…" he said with bliss.

"FATHER! Wake up!" Kazuya yelled.

"Kazuya? What the…" Heihachi looked at the person beside him.

"YES! YES! I GOT HER UNDER MY SPELL! HAHAHAHA" Heihachi said happily as he jumped for joy.

"…gross" everyone said in disgust.

"I went to heaven without you (points at Kazuya),

without you (points at Lee),

without you (points at Paul),

without you (points at Marshall),

without you (points at Nina)

and without you (points at Anna)" Heihachi danced around like crazy.

"Tell me I'm crazy but I don't think this is a dream after all…" Kazuya said.

"Can you score better than me dear children?" he said.

"Remind me to kick his sorry ass and dump it with his thong in a graveyard when we get to Berlin" he said

"Sure" Lee said as took out a clip board and wrote something in it.

'Poor mother, first she married a fart, then she gets this' Kazuya thought and started reminiscing about his mom (aw…).

Heihachi laughed hysterically, the old woman woke up irritated

. "Good morning, sweet ums, have a nice dream?" Heihachi said as he received a hard blow on his head.

"HEY! WHY DID YOU DO THAT FOR!" Heihachi yelled.

"Look at you! Why aren't you treating these children nicely? I thought you said you love me? It was all just a lie!" the old woman yelled. Kazuya and the others were holding back their laughter.

"But sweet ums…" he was cut-off by the very raged old woman

"Don't you sweet ums me you OLD FART!" she said as she walked away.

"Oh, and by the way, nothing happened…" she said in disgust as she walked away.

Heihachi was left with shock in his eyes, his jaw dropped.

"Well, Who's knocking on heaven's door now…" Kazuya said teasingly.

"That's some tight issue you got there Mr. Mishima" Paul said.

"Oh…my love…my darling…"Lee sang in another monotonous voice.

"SHUT UP!" Heihachi yelled.

"'Unchained Melody' suits you…" Anna said.

"Lee, date this woman" Heihachi said.

Anna stopped talking.

"She called me an old fart" Heihachi said as he cried.

"You ARE an old fart…" Kazuya said.

"Curse you and your wife and your son and your daughter and your great grandfather!" Heihachi yelled.

"Man, did that fortune teller really predicted the future?" Kazuya said as he raised an eyebrow.

Heihachi was in a corner, crying.

"Try chanting 'I'm an old fart' while rocking yourself in that corner" Lee said as Heihachi chased him.

"AH!" Lee screamed like a sissy girl, running in slow motion.

"Why is he running like that?" Paul wondered.

They fell down in slow motion, talked in slow motion, fought in slow motion.

"NEO! STOP THAT!" Marshall said. Neo from the matrix came out from the shadows

"Killjoy…" Neo said as he left.

"Neo and John Constantine are both Keanu Reeves, right?" Paul said.

Kazuya was left with bewildering ideas.

'What if Jun loves that Lame Wulong? What if she's still mad at me?' he thought.

"Hey Kazuya, while you are busy thinking about nasty stuffs, we made a clan. A clan called 'Teletubbies'" Paul said.

"I think it's more like Telebakas to me" Kazuya said.

"Hey, you're in this clan! You're Kazzy Mishi!" Paul said.

"Iew…Who are you suppose to be?" Kazuya said as he raised an eyebrow.

"I'm Pauli" he said. "Does Pauli want a cracker?" Kazuya teased.

"Hey!" Paul yelled.

"Anyway, Anna is Anna and Lee is Lee. They don't change names…"Paul said.

"Why?" Kazuya asked. "I've followed the format of the opening theme" Paul said.

"You're evil…" Kazuya said.

"What about Nina and Marshall?" Kazuya asked.

"Nina is Nyunyu the vacuum dog,

Marshall is the narrator" Paul said.

"What about the fart?" Kazuya wondered.

"Instead of a baby sun, let's have an old sun" Paul said. Both he and Kazuya laughed hysterically.

"What's with those two?" Lee asked Heihachi

"HOW SHOULD I KNOW?" Heihachi yelled.

The door of the club suddenly opened.

It's the driver.

"Need a ride?" the driver asked.

"Wait a minute. I could've sworn he's speaking German before…" Kazuya said.

"I ate American beans, what do you expect, Mexican?" Heihachi said.

"…Yuck" Anna said. "Lee, Marry her!" Heihachi said.

"GO TELETUBBIES!" Paul yelled as he ran through the door.

"Tele what?" Marshall asked.

"Trust me. He's so addicted in that show…"Kazuya said as he walked on.

'Jun, we're almost there' Kazuya thought.

**Me:** SUCCESS! That was fun!

**Kazuya:** Sick! Kazzy Mishi? Man, a dog could mistaken me as a chew toy with that name

**Heihachi:** She dumped me……..Wahhhhhhhhhhh

**Marshall:** Heihachi, a baby daddy indeed (Gets Heihachi on cam)

**Nina:** no comment…

**Anna:** For all the men in here, why Lee?

**Lee:** Anna, Anna, Wherefore art thou Anna?

**Keanu Reeves:** Watch the Matrix Trilogy

**Paul:** Teletubbies RULES!

**Old woman:** I wont date farts anymore…

**Me:** He-he, Thanks for reading…


End file.
